Co-op Castle
by NovaStars42
Summary: Kimi bites off more than she can chew when she takes a job as the Red Dawn boarding house's new manager. [set in AU] [oc x Sasori] (Obito x Deidara) (Nagato x Konan) (Hidan x Kurenai)
1. Chapter 1

"Deidara, I've been sitting here enjoying my paper in silence and then in you come, half naked and soaking wet, and I find myself asking why? Why, when I finally get a moment to myself?" Sasori was not a patient man to say the least. At only thirty five, he acted more like an old man than he did a person in the prime of their life. About ten seconds earlier, his friend (if you could call him that) waltzed into the room, and heaving a heavy sigh, threw himself down on the couch next to Sasori.

"Itachi's stupid little brother threw me out of the bathroom!" The blonde exclaimed, clad only in a pair of wet boxers and an angry look set on his features, "he wouldn't even let me grab a towel!"

"And how did he manage that, might I ask?" The red head asked, raising an eyebrow. Deidara only crossed his arms and grumbled something about not wanting to talk about it.

Currently the pair sat in the living room, enjoying their joint day off. It was nice with all of the other tenants in the house at work. It was currently summer, and hot, though with the air conditioning on neither seemed to notice. A perfect afternoon for relaxing really. That was until the door swung open, and in strode another tenant.

"Hey tranny, you trying to fucking seduce Sasori again?" Hidan, the leather clad asshole smirked as he threw the keys of his motorcycle down on a nearby table. If he could be avoided, it was probably best, though he was cruelest to Deidara of all people.

"At least I got a job yeah, you got fired again didn't you?" With a smirk painted on his face, the blonde knew he had him this time.

"Fuck you!" The silver haired man spat, taking off his boot and heaving it at the younger male's head. Snickering while he ducked, Deidara continued his insults.

"And at least I can get up in the morning with out whining like a four year old and a shot of whiskey."

The seething jashinist stomped upstairs and slammed his bedroom door shut, immediately turning on some sort of death metal music as loud as the stereo could bare.

"See what you've gone and done Deidara?" Sasori sighed, he could tell by now that attempting to continue reading would be a hassle, but he was prepared to try anyway.

"Me? What'd I do danna, he started it!"

"Go finish your shower brat, the other brat just shut the water off," Sasori commanded, sick of the bickering and the annoying younger men. He tried to go back to his paper then, he assumed Deidara had gone back upstairs when he heard a knock at the door. The red head had no intentions getting up to get it, being to immersed in his reading.

"Can I help you un?"

Sasori nearly choked. Whipping down his paper from his line of view he found Deidara, now less wet but with the same amount of cloths on with the door wide open and a girl standing on the front stoop.

"Deidara! Go upstairs! Christ, what am I, your baby sitter?"

The younger artist reluctantly, but quickly, left the doorway for the bathroom as his superior came to the door.

"What is it?" Sasori asked impatiently.

"I came about the management job in the paper?" She asked timidly, showing him a folded up, ragged copy of Fridays newspaper with a red circle around one of the squares in the classifieds. Sasori inspected the article, everything seemed to check out. It didn't surprise him that the owner would go and do something like this without telling anyone. Sasori said nothing and allowed her in, motioning to sit in a worn green chair from no earlier than the nineteen seventies.

Sasori made himself a cup of tea and sat back down, picking up his now wrinkled paper and attempted again to go back to reading. He was successful for all of thirty seconds.

"Look, all I'm saying is if we put the old water heater in the shell of a newer one, we could probably pass inspection," a gruff voice came as it entered the room, Kakuzu was home from his job at the bank. He spoke to none other than the pair that owned the building, Konan and Nagato. The woman was quite pleasant, and though she never spoke much, she was not easy to push around. The man on the other hand, was not so pleasant, he not only had a disturbing like for facial piercings, but he was quite arrogant and insisted that people call him Pein. The group shuffled down the hallway near the kitchen and went into an office, completely ignoring the girl. Sasori was just about to raise his reading material again when in filed the rest of the buildings tenants. Sighing, Sasori gave up.

"Go, first door on the right," Sasori told the clearly nervous girl, what, was she biting her nails? Disgusting. She was on her feet, awkwardly fast walking out if the living room as fast as she could. Minutes later she was seated in front of a large dark wood desk, being questioned by the orange haired man.

"What's your name and what are your qualifications?" He asked right off the bat.

"Kimiko, you can call me Kimi if you like," the girl smiled. She smiled with her teeth with straight shoulders and confidence Pein noted, though her over all body language was that of apprehension, "and I uh, managed a nice cream parlor where I used to live."

Honestly, anything was better than nothing. For a while now, his wife had been bothering him about going on a trip so they got tickets, and when their past manager quit, just like all the rest, it sent him scrambling to find another house manager. A happy wife was a happy life right? Now he just had to make it look good. He was about to start in on another set of questions when Konan interrupted him.

"For Christ's sakes! You hired! We leave tomorrow morning Nagato! What are you even doing?" The couple started to bicker, producing a sigh out of the strange man on the other side of the room.

"I'm Kakuzu," the man grunted as he pushed himself off of the wall he was leaning on, "I'm the accountant for the building and I'm going to be keeping an eye on you while the happy couple is out. We're paying you three hundred dollars a month, but the top loft of the building is yours to live in, so don't go complaining about money. We shell out cash for dinner, but breakfast and lunch are on your own," the man instructed as he stood in front of her, then he reached over and pulled a sticky note off of the desk. He looked at it for a second before putting it back down to rummage through more papers until he found what he was looking for.

"This is a list of stuff you need to be on top of," he said, about to hand it to herm only to pull it out of her reach at the last second, "and try to keep things fairly cheep if your shopping for the house," he sneered before he shoved the list into her lap and left. Kimi was up shortly after him, fallowing him out to get away from the arguing in the office.

Kimi supposed she was incredibly lucky, hired on the spot with a new apartment, she was sure she couldn't have found a better place to work. In the back of her mind, she hoped this would be at least a little interesting, but common sense told her to wish it wouldn't.

"Hey, your still here," carrying a bag of chips, the blonde who'd originally opened the door to let her in came from the kitchen to her right. Now fully clothed and dry, he was confident Sasori wouldn't yell at him, at least for now.

"Yeah, uh, they hired me for building manager!" Kimi smiled, and took a handful of cheese flavored potato chips as he offered.

"That's great, congrats, you got stuff to move in? I could get Kisame and Tobi to help you if you'd like. We need more pretty girls around here you know?" Kimi blushed with his words, was he really saying that to her?

"Oh, uh, oh, I just have a chair and some sheets and cloths back where I'm staying, I think I can get it, but thanks," she tried to back away but he wouldn't allow it.

"That's fine, I'll help you and then we can go out for ice cream, sound good?" He took her hand in his, further serving to unnerve the girl until she finally agreed. It took Deidara a few minutes to hassle the keys to Sasori's car from the red head, but eventually they were pulling out of the driveway much faster than Kimi liked. The girl was more than a little confused by the city streets, she'd just moved here with her friends whom she'd had a falling out with. The crummy apartment she was in was spewn with all sorts of junk, bottles, papers, clothing and carry out boxes covered the floor. the chair she claimed to own was a cream color, dirty from the move and the other house mates. After she collected the rest of her belongings and a large bottle of vodka (she claimed it was collateral for money they owed her) they were on this marry way to the ice cream shop.

Now seated on the curb, each with a vanilla cone, Kimi was already feeling better, not only because of her good fortune, but because she was making a new friend.

"So, I told you how I got here, now you," she shoved her ice cream into her mouth to avoid having to talk again. Everyone with good manners knew you shouldn't talk with your mouthful.

"Shit, I came here with nothing. My parents are god damned rich, but I got real sick of them, they were never around you know, so uh, when I turned eighteen I just left," he took bites of his quickly melting ice cream, speaking between bites, "Mr. Akasuna is gonna wonder where his car is."

"What'd you call him?" Kimi asked, throwing her cup away and pulling out a tube of hand sanitizer from her purse.

"Uh, he's my boss so, uh, I'm supposed to call him that at work and," Kimi nodded, understanding, so he stopped speaking as they got into the car and drove home.

When they arrived Chinese take out was on the table. After roping Kisame into carrying the chair up the stairs for them, Deidara grabbed them a box and a couple of bowls and made his way up after them with Kimi's second suite case.

Being a germaphobe, Kimi refused to sit on the bed until after she cleaned it, so the night ended with them sitting on the floor eating Chinese with the windows open. The view wasn't great but Kimi was still able to see the sky turning purple and the building line on the horizon as the sun set.

The room was as long as the house and the door was in the floor, only an old ladder was there to help them up and down. The walls on the east side of the room were straight, however on the west, where the two person bed was, they sloped with the roof, giving that side a unique A frame look. The carpet was old and not terribly worn, however dust covered everything and there were no curtains in sight on the faded grey walls. The light fixture was dated, however there were shelves on the eastern sections walls, enough room Kimi supposed for her clothing and anything else she picked up.

"Bust out the vodka," Deidara urged but she refused, not without clean cups she told him, so Deidara got a pair of red solo cups from his bedroom after a momentary wait. After inspecting the cups, she uncapped the bottle. After they threw back the cups like shot glasses and the burn in her throat eased, she thought to ask how old her new friend was.

"Nineteen," he said casually, but Kimi nearly spat out her next drink.

"Give me that! Your underage!" She freaked, trying to snatch the cup away from him.

"Relax hm, nobody's gonna tell," he laughed, and poured himself another drink. Kimi still didn't like it. He couldn't tell if she was a push over or just afraid to argue. Deidara left her around midnight, but the twenty five year old girl was still up, lost in thought, at three am.

It'd taken so much for her to move, she mused, and now forced to admit she really only moved because her friends pressured her into it. She was alone in this strange place, and unable to sleep on the bed because her mind reasoned it had all sorts of germs harbored on it. She was now quite drunk and tired, laying with her head propped up on one of her chair's arms and her feet over the other side, she covered herself with a leaf printed throw blanket and cried for a while. She was absolutely smashed, and she reasoned that was the only reason she was crying, though with alcohol in her brain she couldn't put two and two together.

She awoke before the sun had even began to peek over the skyline. She hadn't slept much, but she slept enough to burn most of the alcohol off, leaving her with a splitting head ache. She resolved to go out and get some basics once she got paid, a mini fridge, a micro wave, maybe a water cooler. Probably not all at once, she didn't have the money, but eventually if she had it her way she'd never have leave her room. She found a nearly dry box of wet wipes in one of her suite cases and dusted off some shelving to put her cloths away. She hated how she'd left in a hurry. Everything was crammed into her suite cases, the shirts with the jeans and her winter cloths with her summer, it drove her batty.

By the time everything was to her liking, almost everyone had left for work besides the recently unemployed Hidan and Sasuke, one of the tenants younger brother. Pulling the list from her pants pocket, she gave it a once over.

'Check laundry sign up sheet (make sure it's fair), make dinner plans (two weeks in advance!), mind the living room, clear hallways, process necessary daily paperwork,' it read, giving way to a longer list that spanned both sides of the page. Christ was had she gotten herself into?

This is is sort of a mediocre first chapter, I had to work some ideas out quick, when I get more time I'll update with something better!


	2. Chapter 2

I would be lying if I said being the manager of this building wasn't hard. My first day on the job I was completely alone in the house save for one of the tenants younger brother, but he never left their room. I retrieved my list and a shot of vodka to begin my day with, and started by cleaning up a little.

I quickly discovered I was nothing more than a glorified maid. I started with cleaning up the kitchen, but that quickly became an all day endeavor. Everything was filthy, dirty dishes stacked so high they looked like someone had tried to build a replica of the leaning tower of pisa. ( And boy where they leaning.) I discovered that this boarding house had three sets of dinner wear, all of which were sorted into piles and manually cleaned so I could be sure they were germ free. After deciding to trust the dishwasher for cups and bowls, I set to cleaning out the refrigerator. I made quick work of all the outdated items, however there was a literal mess of labeled food on the shelves, each with a different tenants name. Using painters tape, I made each person there own space, and left the very bottom for house food.

Unfortunately, my escapade had cost me most of the day, so I decided to vacuum and then sit down to watch some tv. Of course I had to vacuum, it's more of the illusion there are less germs I tried to tell myself. Besides, I deserved a rest.

About an hour before the rest of the tenants were due home, I heard the light thumping of feet coming down the stairs. This sixteen year old kid appeared shortly after, his black hair styled into spikes.

"Can I help you?" I asked, trying to sound polite. He looked over at me for a moment, his eyes large and child like, before he turned away.

"Just came down for some popcorn," he muttered, though it was further muffled by his retreating back. I watched him enter the kitchen, I heard the popcorn, and then watched him climb the stairs again with a large bowl in his hands.

"What's your name?" I asked loudly, getting up quickly to stand at the bottom of the stairs.

"Uh, Sasuke," he said, standing at the top, but leaning away. I could tell he was not interested in talking.

"If you ever need anything, come get me Sasuke," I smiled awkwardly. He looked at me blankly before walking away and it wasn't until I heard his door shut I realized how pervish that sounded. I resisted the urge to literally slap myself and took my seat back on the couch. My next bit of excitement was the tenants walking through the door, one by one, and upon noticing me, introduced themselves.

Kisame was the first, a huge hulk of a guy, who told me he worked as a life guard at a local hotel pool. Judging by the swim trunks and his bleached looking hair, he probably spent a lot of time in the pool himself. Over all he seemed pretty nice, a bit intimidating because of his size, but he was content to sit with me as I watched the travel channel. He wasn't terribly chatty, but not too quiet either.

A dark haired man came through the door during the middle of our conversation. He greeted us while he kicked off his shoes and hurried upstairs with a laptop bag.

"Itachi is a pretty busy guy, he manages the hotel I work at," Kisame told me as he pulled over a foot stool and kicked back.

"Why doesn't he just live at the hotel?" I asked, he'd been in such a hurry it made me worry if he was okay.

"Because this house happens to be on the edge of a good school district for his younger brother, he claims Sasuke is some kind of genius," the man was gone for a second, and returned with a bag of chips.

"Why does Sasuke live with Itachi and not his parents?" I asked, refusing to take any of the chips, it was clear it wasn't just Deidara and I eating out of this bag now. Kisame shrugged. He claimed he didn't know, the Uchiha's were apparently very privet people. Sasori and Deidara returned next, Deidara plopping down next to Kisame and stuck his hand into the chip bag.

"Have fun today?" He asked, chewing chips in his cheek so he could converse with us.

"I suppose so, the kitchen looks better at least," I noted as Kakuzu returned home, yelling at Hidan as they walked through the door. I hadn't heard his car pull in or the engine of the motorcycle either. Hidan mostly ignored us, though he did spare us one glance as he took his still jobless self upstairs. When I turned to look at Kakuzu he was rubbing his temples.

"What are you doing sitting there?!" He shouted, "do you see what time it is? Are you planning on making something to eat or getting fired?"

That sent me scrambling to the kitchen, I could not loose this job! The only problem was my limited cooking skills. Finally after going over what we had to use and what I knew how to make, I decided my only option was grilled cheese. There were twenty four individual slices of cheese in the package, and I used every one of them. A vat of tomato soup joined the sandwiches on the counter, a sort of assembly line had began to forum. Plates were set above the silver wear drawer, and the sandwiches were next to those, the pot of soup was farther back on the counter, bowls and crackers in front of that.

I served myself first and after a few of the other tenants noticed I had food, they filed in to get some for themselves. Deidara and Sasori joined me at the dinning room table, though the other guys choose to sit in the living room after a football game was turned on. Only the Uchihas were missing.

"You cook better than my mom yeah," Deidara commented between bites.

"If only," I laughed, "you call this cooking?"

"Better than take out," he shrugged and Sasori grunted in agreement, "comfort food is the best."

"What's the story on the Uchihas?" I asked, picking up spoonful after spoonful of soup only to drop it back into the bowl. Only after the two men were silent did I realize how strange my question might have been.

"Don't worry about them, nothing they do concerns anyone else," Sasori droned lazily. He'd finished his meal quickly and now stood up to take care of his dishes.

"Run some water in that bowl after you've finished, Deidara," Sasori sounded to me like a scolding mother and I wondered if their was something behind that. Deidara didn't answer him.

"Want mine?" I asked, shoving my bowl of still warm soup in his direction. He nodded with a mouth full of grilled cheese and I joined Sasori in the kitchen. He was busy cleaning dishes but I was busy dirtying more. I cradled two plates in the crooks of my elbows so I could carry a bowl in each hand upstairs. Several times I thought the cheesy sandwiches might meet a dirty carpeted fate, but I got them to their destination with slow walking and pure determination. Now the problem was how to knock on the Uchiha's door? I settled for kicking it, and just when I thought no one would answer, it opened.

"Could I help you?" The younger Uchiha had an xbox head set on, a wireless controller in his left hand. His blood shot eyes were a key he'd been at it for a while.

"I uh, brought you guys up dinner," I smiled sheepishly. Sasuke raised an eyebrow. I could hear his brother talking on a phone behind him, making me wonder just how this room was set up.

"Thank you," he said in a tone that reminded me of a rehearsing actor. He took the bowls and set them down before taking the plates. He promptly shut the door in my face after. I was a bit angry after, but I chalked it up to who I was dealing with. I'd take Sasori's advice from now on and not worry about them.

"Kimi! Sasori says were gonna go out, come with us!" Deidara called from downstairs, and I turned away, fully prepared to put what just happened behind me. I had to change my shirt of course, because of all the cleaning I'd done and dirt I'd got on it, so when I arrived down stairs, I found Sasori in the drivers seat of his car and Deidara in the passenger seat. When I got in, I found they both already had their seat belts on and the radio station adjusted.

"Sorry about the radio, he wouldn't let me pick a station," Deidara said, twisting around to face me. I didn't even get a chance to listen to whatever was on before Sasori started speaking.

"Please Deidara, there's nothing wrong with the news, and Kimiko, next time we offer to take you somewhere, get here in a timely fashion. I hate to be kept waiting," Sasori spoke very matter of factly, pulling out of the drive way in one easy, steady motion, using the appropriate speed unlike Deidara had. Kimi didn't apologize, just sighed and asked where they were headed.

"Sasori, uh, Mr. Akasuna owns a toy store. We're gonna go lock up," Deidara answered, reaching out for the radio tuner only to have his hand slapped away. The drive downtown was making my head spin. While trying to tune out the bickering in the front seat I tried in vain to learn roads and draw a map in her head but the toy store made it all worth it.

The building was small and brick, attached to three others in a line of town house topped shops. The front window was filled with beach themed items such as water floats and a few stuffed animals wearing sunglasses. The inside of the building wasn't much farther off.

It was like a dream, I mused, with planes and hit air balloons hung from the ceiling and colorful packages covering every shelf right down to the floor.

"Isn't it cool?" Deidara asked, catching the keys Sasori threw to him from the register. I could only nod for a moment.

"You work here?" I asked, turning around in a complete circle.

"Yeah, Sasori's nephews and niece help too. The little cretins should be around here somewhere," Deidara spoke while focused on locking the old looking door and older looking latch.

"Cretins huh?" A femine voice spoke, and twisting around, a blonde haired girl stood with her hands on her hips. She couldn't have been much more than a few years younger than myself and judging by her outfit she was headed to the beach after this.

"Shut up Temari, before I tell your uncle about that asshole you let into the back room today, what was his name, Shikamaru?" Deidara hissed with a Cheshire grin, brushing by her. I danced nervously in place before deciding to fallow him past the angry teenager.

"Deidara, try not to bully the kids will you?" Sasori scolded, stopping in the middle of checking his till in the cash register. Deidara rolled his eyes. Two more boys came out of the back room, the elder boy with brown hair introduced himself as Kankuro and introduced his red haired younger brother as Gaara. These two wore slightly darker clothing, jeans in the summer paired with thick cotton T-shirts, and I thought that odd. The older boy produced a large file from his pocket and asked Deidara to give it to his uncle, and after a quick fist bump, he and his brother left via the back door. Temari was waving good bye minutes later, a boy pulling up in a cherry red convertible.

Youth, I sighed and I sure hoped those high school kids were having fun on their summer vacation, because I'd give anything to be back there right now.

"Did you wanna go to the beach too?" Deidara asked, "it's just a land locked lake, but uh," he stammered, handing the keys back to his boss. He muttered something only he could hear and handed Sasori the file next. It resembled something I used on my nails, though it was much more course and rough.

"Did you wanna see the work shop?" Deidara asked, pulling my attention from the rasp. Deidara motioned for me to fallow him, and we walked though a crowed back room of boxes until we reached a poorly painted red door. Behind it was a small, dark room lined with tools, wood, paint, and marionettes. The room smelled like wood stain and Pine, wood chips and split paint covered the floor. I was afraid to ask what this exactly was, it was far too creepy, and that was okay with Deidara, the blonde liked explaining things and talking honestly. All my attention was on him if she was listening.

"Sasori makes them, he says its some sort of dying art," Deidara rolled his eyes, "but if you asked me, this isn't art at all."

"We haven't asked you, Deidara," Sasori's voice surprised Me from behind, his arm reaching across my shoulder to flick on a light, illuminating the room.

"The stain I put on the wood insures it will never rot away, these will be here long after all of us are gone. It's a legacy, it's eternal beauty, something very special," Sasori spoke, pushing past us and pulling a marionette from a hat tree used to hold them. Gently he untangled the strings and began making the limbs, joint by joint the tiny puppet complied, extending a hand to us. The puppet had no particular features, no colored paint, cloths, or even a face, however the surface was smooth and soft, and reminded me of an artists pose referencing doll. Deidara humphed, crossing his arms.

"I'm going to start the car," he grumbled, taking the car keys out of his pocket and jingling them in front of Sasori. He was out the back door in seconds. Sasori hung his puppet back up, placed the file he'd received from his nephew earlier back into its spot, and shut the light off.

"Come along," Sasori said, his tone empty as he brushed past her, shutting the door. The car ride home was silent, My head was spinning with not only directions but with the new information I'd taken in about the people in front of her. They bickered nonstop, but I wasn't bothered. Actually it might have been kind of endearing. Something about the marionettes though, something about them interested me.

When Kimi returned home, she retreated to her room and her bottle of vodka. The sun went down beautifully around eight, by nine she was plastered, and at ten she passed out for a little over two hours. She'd probably had a little bit too much to drink and was missing home a little too much that night, and unsure of the current time when she woke up, she stumbled down stairs to find Sasori, Kisame and Kakuzu watching a late night news program. The three men watched her for a moment before passing the inebriated girl off as none of their business. She had the red solo cup from the night before in her hand, sipping it absentmindedly as she tried in vain to read the time running across the bottom of the screen. She nursed her drink a little more and moved, now standing smack dab in the middle of the living room she seemed unaware that she wasn't the only person here.

Sasori moved to cross his right leg over his left, his annoyance and impatience with the drunk girl in his line of view reaching a fever pitch. As he folded his legs, his knee cracked, and silently he cursed it, what was he? An old man?

Kimi twisted around, her selective senses picking up on the sound. She stared at him for a moment, finally noticing him. She opened her mouth slowly, as if to ask a question, and promptly threw up all over him.


	3. Chapter 3

My head hurt so terribly when I woke up, I was sure I was going to die. I was laying in my bed, my horrible, unclean, unlaundered bed. Once I realized I was laying in a germ infested kingdom of dirt, I almost jumped out of my skin. I had goose bumps and my hair stood on end, my mind rushed. I threw whatever blanket was on top of me off and quickly collected my things to take a shower, I needed one, right that second. I don't think I ever scrubbed my skin so hard in my life.

After finishing up my morning sick, I finally wandered downstairs after realizing I needed to get some kind of work done today. I checked the laundry schedule and marked myself down, wrote out a meal plan for the next two weeks, and straightened up the living room before laying down a towel and flopping myself down on the couch. I immersed myself into desperate housewives for the afternoon, well, for about a half hour until the resident biker came down the stairs.

"Hey! I wanna know how hung over is hungover?" He asked laughing rudely. My head ache couldn't even begin to tolerate him. He took the remote from me and sat down in a chair, changing my channel faster than I could object.

"Please," I whined. He wasn't listening.

"As if I give a shit! It's your own fault," he smirked, the big stupid bully. I rolled over, turning around so I couldn't see him and was preparing to ignore him.

"I heard you threw up on Sasori, like total upchuck all over him!"

I sat up, spinning around.

"I did what?" I exclaimed, I vaguely remembered stumbling down stairs last night but after that it was all dark. Hidan, I believe his name was, clad in his old rock band t-shirt and leather jacket, black jeans and combat boots laughed in my face. Jesus Christ what else couldn't I remember? Hidan kept talking, and made it clear to me that not only was he very selfish, but he insisted that all of the attention was on him. Every sentence started with I but somehow came back around to make fun of my hang over, as if I was going to give in to the teasing and snap at him.

"I heard you were a pretty big alcoholic yourself," I spat finally, groaning at the shrillness of my own voice.

"I'm not a alcoholic you dumb cunt," he swore, I snickered.

"That's what I keep telling myself too," I added and pulled my hands up to lay them over my face. He was quiet for a few seconds, I heard him rustling in his coat pocket.

"You gonna yell at me if I smoke in here?" He asked, I heard the click of a lighter, he'd lit the end of his menthol cigarette anyway.

"I'm not sure what your talking about, I never saw anything," I said flatly, and I litterally couldn't see anything. In reference to the rest of my body, my stomach felt the worst. It churned in a bubbling way that made me think I might throw up again any second.

"You got gas in your motorcycle?" I asked, he grunted in response.

"Would you drive me up to Walgreens or something?" I sighed, lifting my hands from my face and worsening my head ache with the influx of light.

"Later," he said, standing up and walking out of the room. I wasn't sure if he ment he'd take me later or if he was saying goodbye. A few hours of desperate housewives later, Kisame came home from work, smelling strongly like chlorine and his hair was slightly damp.

"So uh, I thought I'd be the first one to tell you that you threw up all over Sasori last night, he's pretty pissed," Kisame retrieved another bag of chips for today and sat down in the chair Hidan had been sitting in. I didn't bother to tell him that the leather clad asshole had beat him to it. I didn't answer him, just rolled back over.

"I gotta ask, why are you laying on a towel?" The life guard asked between handfuls of chips.

"Germs," I muttered, "do you have a car Kisame? I need to go to Walgreens."

"Sorry squirt, I'm in for the night," he replied. Of course he was. Deidara and Sasori came home next, fallowing the same unofficial arrival time schedule the house used every day. Deidara patted me on my head and sat down at the other end of the couch, shoving my feet over. I couldn't see Sasori from where I was sitting, and that was probably a good thing. Deidara and Kisame chatted a little bit before Deidara flicked my hand that lay on my hip.

"Want some aspirin?" He asked, I nodded and he was gone for a second, and returned with nothing but a glass of water. Apparently he'd run out, but he'd still thought he had a few left. I'd known him for a total of three days, and already I could see we were taking turns being the 'older sibling.' He was a lot like me, he'd probably been the only child at home, or maybe the favorite child, and got all the attention, but now that he was alone and now that I was alone, we both wanted somebody to cling to. We both wanted that attention back.

"Kakuzu 's home," Kisame mumbled, standing up and leaving the room. I was confused for a minute, but then I realized I was going to get my ass chewed out. The door opened slowly, and the foot steps on the floor seemed calm enough, but the accountants voice did not match. I couldn't see him, the back of the couch was to the door, and I didn't want to see him.

"Where is she," he seethed. Deidara didn't say anything and Kakuzu commanded him to leave the room too. He huffed and walked out as I sat up. I wasn't ready for this, my heart pounded and my breathing quickened, I pulled my knees to my chest and I was sure my eyes were wide as he walked around to face me.

"You are so god damn lucky I can't fire you, because your ass would be on the curb right now!" Kakuzu growled, his voice rising until he was screaming and my eyes were watering, "how unprofessional can you get? It knew it was a mistake to hire a mealy mouthed, pathetic little thing like you, your unqualified and inexperienced! This is not a doll house where everything is fine and dandy, you don't just live here, you work here! Not to mention, do you know who had to fucking clean that up?"

I choked a little bit, near hyperventilation and unable to answer him.

"Don't do it again!" He shouted finally, and I could finally feel my feet enough to jump off of the couch and take myself through the kitchen and into the back yard. I hid myself on the side of the house, leaning against the siding in the hot afternoon sun. I was on the verge of a panic attack and stricken by unbearable anxiety.

I was gonna get fired, I was gonna be homeless, I'd never get to go to college, I'd end up in debt, my parents would reject me, all of these crazy things filled my head, impossible things that would result in my subsequent death or failure.

"Hey there,"

I jumped, my eyes snapped open (I hadn't even realized I'd closed them) and my breathe caught in my throat. A man was standing in front of me, he was my age, maybe a few years older, taller too, with short, unkept black hair. He wore an awful color blue shirt with a bright orange lanyard around his neck.

"What's the difference between an old bus stop and a lobster with boobs?" He asked, smiling calmly.

"What?" I breathed, finally exhaling the air I'd taken in.

"It's a joke, guess the answer," he said, making a spinning hand motion as if to say 'go on.' I thought for a moment and then shrugged slowly.

"Ones a crusty bus station, and the others a busty crustacean," he smirked a little and snickered at his own joke, "you don't get it do you? That's okay, I'm Tobi."

"Kimi," I mumbled.

"I heard Kakuzu yelling and I figured I'd get in on the action," he laughed again, "I live in the building behind this one, there's a gate behind the hedges over there," he motioned, jutting his thumb behind him, "I haven't seen you around before."

"I'm uh, supposed to be the new building manager," I sighed, "but um..."

"That's okay, the old mans got a stick up his ass anyway," he said, referencing Kakuzu, "come on, it's Friday right? Call take out for the house and get Deidara, we'll go do something fun."

I wasn't exactly sure about him. He clearly had prior knowledge of the house meal plan and knew the other tenants, but he also knew Deidara, someone I sort of trusted. I fallowed his idea and ordered pizza for the house that night. I laid it out and got Deidara some before I called the rest of the house for dinner.

"God damn it, who let him in here?" Hidan groaned, and I was about to ask what he was talking about when Tobi spoke up.

"Ohh ho ho Hidan that's not very funny! You wouldn't say mean things about Tobi in front of his face would you? Oh wait, you might actually, I forgot that you aren't quite up to standard in the brains department," Tobi giggled, his voice getting higher and he seemed to take on another personality.

"Call me stupid again maggot," Hidan growled, grabbing a plate and going to sit down.

"I never said you were," Tobi chirped. The other house tenants seemed to downright ignore him, save for Deidara. The blonde sighed when he saw him, and took the plate I was handing him, and the three of us retreated to the living room to let them eat. I refused food, with my stomach the way it was I couldn't bear it. It seemed with Tobi around, it seems we were being avoided.

"Me and miss Kimi want to know if you'd like to go have fun with us, would you buddy, old pal, would you?" Tobi asked, his voice sing song like a child.

"Sure, whatever," Deidara mumbled in an annoyed tone, "Kimi, would you go up to my room and get the black bag from under my bed and lock the door?"

I didn't reply but I did stare at him for a minute. He wanted me to go into his room? Get under his bed? Not only the germs he probably had, but I didn't want to know what teenage boys keep in their rooms.

"There's nothing bad up there, it's fine," he urged, shoving his face full of breadstick and garlic butter. Reluctantly I did as I was asked.

Deidara's room was not fine. It reminded me of my old apartment I shared with my friends with trash, bottles, and clothing litterally every surface. His bedding was white, and the box spring has no skirt, so it was easy to find the bag long before I'd bent down to pick it up.

"Might I ask what your doing?" Sasori's level voice came from the doorway, and I don't think I was ever on my feet so fast.

"D-Dei, uh, Deidara asked me to get his b-bag," I stuttered, facing the redhead while I clutched the black canvas bag in my hands. He cocked an eyebrow.

"I um, I'm very sorry that, um, I threw up on you, I'm sorry," I said hurriedly. I wanted to get it out there and over with as fast as I could no matter how embarrassing. He seemed to think for a moment before he answered.

"I accept your apology, however, I don't forgive you."

I sighed deeply.

"Could I make it up to you somehow?"

"I'll think about it," he replied, and walked the opposite way down the hall, into his room and closed the door. There was no reason to panic now, I told myself, he was gone and I could calm down.

I brought the heavy black bag downstairs, and with every step I took a metallic rattle hurt my headache more than I could handle. When I arrived in the living room, Deidara was leaned towards Tobi, speaking with him in a hushed tone, but once he noticed me, he sat back up straight and cleared his throat.

"Is miss Kimi ready to go? The dynamic duo Deidara and Tobi are ready to become the dynamic trio!" Tobi threw his arms out as he spoke, bending his thumbs and pinkie fingers back to show me the number three on each hand. Deidara stood up, took the bag from me and without another word we left the house via the back door, we were threw the hidden gate when Deidara proceeded to start ripping Tobi a new ass.

"I don't understand why you have to do that Tobi, that voice is horrible, you look like a three year old with all of those exuberant hand motions, and you talk in fucking circles."

"Gotta keep up the image," Tobi replied, his voice deep and back to normal. He cleared his throat a few times between the inside of his house and the back gate. He was only a few seconds grabbing his keys from inside, and a few seconds after that the three of us were in his car. I hadn't even thought to ask where we were going.

"I'd like it if you kept this a secret Kimi," he said, looking threw his rear view mirror at me as he smoothly cruised around a corner, "I pretend to be an idiot to avoid quite a few not so choice people in my life... not that it matters, I'll just deny it anyway."

I made a motion to zip my lips quietly and I watched him smile through the mirror.

"Where to?" He asked, turning momentarily to Deidara, but then back to the road to flash some asshole with his bright lights on.

"Down town, I saw a fresh painted wall the other day when I was at the bank with Sasori," he answered, pulling a spray paint can out of the black bag. That explained the rattling. He shook each can individually, laying out colors in his lap after he'd finished. Blues, reds, lots of blacks and whites. We pulled over down town and parked and I paid the meter. They'd clearly intended to leave it like they intended to leave me, so jogging to catch up with them was my only choice. This made me nervous, inner city's were usually surrounded by bad parts of town, no matter how nice this mini business district was. We walked past the bank Deidara had mentioned and a few buildings down was a blank white wall on the side of a closed down coin shop. The shop was on the corner, so this wall faced the nonexistent traffic. Tobi and I sat down, leaning against a lamp post facing the building. There was a brick planter that went around the side of the building filled with dead plants no one bothered to pull up and Deidara, after putting a black bandana around his nose, hoisted himself on top of it with a black can of spray paint and started on a curved shape.

"What are you doing?!" I exclaimed only to be shushed. I wasn't sure what I'd thought the paint had been for in the first place.

"Keep it down!" Deidara hissed, "it's fine, there just gonna paint over it again later. That's the point, I only paint in places I know they'll get rid of it. It's fleeting, every work is unique and it's only here for a short time," he smiled a wicked, twisted smile as he rounded off an edge. My hangover wasn't making my stomach do flips now, it was him. Tobi stood up and crossed the street, ducking into a party store and returning with a bottle of whiskey and a can of coke.

"Take a drink," he said, throwing back the bottle. I opened the can and sipped it, but no sooner had I brought it to my lips did he take it back and proceeded to pour it into the whiskey bottle, and then back into the can very carefully.

"I shouldn't," I told him, but he shoved it back into my hands.

"I shouldn't either," he smirked, "we got our designated driver putting on a show and life's good. Relax okay?"

I shouldn't drink this, I knew that and I knew myself. I could see myself developing this problem when I moved in with my friends, I'd been the first to turn twenty one and by extension became the booze buyer. I'd been living here three months before I decided to move out, my pervious friends owed me too much money and were only contributing to my problem, and I knew this was a mistake. It was a mistake, a huge mistake. I took a swig anyway.

Deidara was busy with his mural, I wasn't sure exactly what it was just yet, some kind of abstract with a mixed light blue back ground, a green center spiraling outwards and some oval shaped objects that were beginning to look like birds.

"What's in the center of an island?" Deidara called, not taking his eyes off of his master piece.

"A star," Tobi returned. An hour and two empty drink cans later, Deidara stepped away from the wall, he pulled his bandana away from his face and presented it to us.

"He fishes for compliments," Tobi whispered, standing up to litterally give his friend a pat on the back, "this might be the best one yet!"

The wall had been painted in an aerial view of an island, almost spider like with the sandbars around the main land form. It was covered in greenery with bright sandy beaches, and birds circling it through the clouds. At the very center of the island was a star shaped pond, just a few shades lighter than the ocean. The paint he used was probably good quality and the shades astounded me. It wasn't particularly large, but it wasn't small either, about an arms reach in every direction.

"It's so pretty, I didn't know spray paint came in so many colors," I muttered, "where'd you learn to do this?"

"Rich kids get bored," he said, "not to mention, I was born with this amazing gift, this is a talent."

It seemed like a crime for someone to paint over this, I couldn't believe he was alright with just... abandoning this to be destroyed. It didn't seem to effect his ego any.

"It certainly is," Tobi beamed, seemingly just as proud of the painting as Deidara was.

We stood around a while longer, admiring our friends work and then left without so much as taking a picture. I'd be gone three days later. We went back to Tobi's house after, he had a two liter, movies he'd pirated off of the Internet and I was invited to stay the night. I thanked him, but insisted that I leave for my own room. I walked back home, locked up the house and climbed the first set of stairs. As I walked past each door, I tried to remember who's was who's. The Uchihia's were first on the left, Kisame was across from them. Hidan's door was black and beat up, so his was easy. Sasori's door was at the end of the hall, the door was plain, a light colored oak and I noticed as I neared it that it was ajar. I reached my hand out to shut the door for him when it opened by itself and the red headed occupant stood lazy eyed in the bright light.

"Could I help you?" He asked, his voice monotone and tired sounding.

"Oh, I was just going to shut your door for you, I'm sorry," I said, trying to sound genuine. Had he known I was here?

"That's alright," he droned stepping out of the room and closing the door, "I'm going downstairs."

I hastily moved out of the way and he stepped by me without another word.

"Uh, Sasori," I said a bit louder than I'd wanted to, and instantly regretted it.

"Yes?" He said, turning around to look at me with the same uninterested expression.

"Would you like some company?" I asked, my words sort of muddled shyly together.

"No, " he replied, considering it slowly and thoroughly for a moment, "good night," he added as he turned his back to me and walked down the hall and down the stairs. He hasn't said it in a mean way and I wasn't insulted, but he hadn't been polite either.

That was okay, not even considering Id vomited all over him the night before. I vaguely wondered if he thought I was drunk. Sasori was a different kind of person than I was, and I accepted it. I opened the door at the very end of the wall that closely resembled a closet, the door that hid the stairs up to my bed room, and once again feel asleep in the empty, dirty room that held my entire life to fall asleep in my chair.


	4. Chapter 4

It was much easier getting up Saturday morning without a hang over. I'd successfully had a drink without getting drunk and I was feeling pretty good about my self control until I realized, after looking at a piece of paper stuck to my door, I'd defaulted on a ton of my duties as building manager. It was a huge list of things I'd supposedly not done, and I thought Kakuzu was just trying to get the best of me. Heck, some of the stuff listed wasn't in my original list of duties, not to mention there was no contract and no real official listing I had to do.

I was cleaning bathrooms from nine to ten, doing dishes and organizing the kitchen from ten to eleven, I breaked for lunch at twelve and by one I'd given up on having my day off. Cleaning wasn't really something I minded, I liked things tidy and germ free. The more disinfectant whipes I used the better I felt about things.

Today was the designated day off for the majority of the tenants, and I was informed upon Kakuzu's return home that many of them wouldn't be home tonight.

"So, um, I wanted to talk to you about this list," I said, unfolding it from my pants pocket, "what's with all this?"

"Their requests from the tenants. There's a sheet just inside the office you've been neglecting, listen, they pay an extra fifty dollars a month for full housing, including the extra services like cooking and keeping things clean, there's no negotiating," the accountant explained in a much mellower tone than I'd heard perviously, "where's the meal plan for the next two weeks?"

I pointed to the notes sheet on the refrigerator, now covered inappropriate drawings of male genitalia and the symbol for Hidan's cult in dark ink.

"So, uh, what'd you guys do if the building manager before couldn't cook?" I asked as he scanned over the sheet.

"Take out," he answered, going to pocket the paper when I took it quickly out of his hands.

"Sorry, uh, not done with it yet," I smiled, in a sort of pathetic way actually, and dashed upstairs to vacuum the hallway. I could almost feel his glare on my back as I ran, but the noise from the vacuum drowned out any smart comebacks he might have. I made a mental note to check that list in the office more often.

Next, after checking the laundry sheet again, I discovered it was my turn, and nearly jumped for joy when I read the page. I was probably the only person I knew that was so excited about doing laundry, but it also meant a clean sheet and clean cloths. I could sleep in my actual bed tonight instead of the chair.

Kakuzu was right about the majority of the tenants not returning home, half of them stayed out al night. Itachi rushed in at eight, Kisame staggered in at eleven, both gone up to bed after their return, Sasuke meet his curfew at eleven thirty after being dumped off by a noisy car driven by a red headed teenage girl, and finally Sasori opened the door at midnight.

I was down stairs, watching a hallmark movie with Kakuzu reading opposite me in the chair when Sasori arrived. His car was quiet, like he was, so I hadn't noticed him until the door clicked shut. I twisted around to see who was the last to make it home but settled back down after. Sasori picked up the half of the news paper Kakuzu had finished with and sat down on the other end of the couch, flipping it open and going to the local news section.

I hadn't realized I'd been starring until he caught me.

"Could I help you?" He asked, sounding slightly irritated. Something about his gaze made me squirm.

"I uh, was just wondering what it was you um, wanted me to do to make up, um, to make up for um, well you know," I finished nervously, his gaze softened a little, but not much.

"No, I haven't," he answered, going back to his paper. I left it alone after that, and was about to turn into bed when the phone rang. I answered with a brisk hello despite the time and was treated with a groan.

"Uh, Kimi, it's Deidara. Listen, uh, I'm up town by fifth and dodge, I got in trouble and they won't let me go until somebody comes and gets me," he sounded defeated, his speech impediment acting up as his voice sort of wavered in and out.

"Who are you in trouble with?" I asked, and I heard both of the news papers behind me fold.

"The cops," he muttered, probably feeling ashamed to admit it after the show he put on last night.

"Is it Hidan or Deidara?" Kakuzu asked, his deep, gruff voice projecting over the room. I responded it was the later, and Sasori stood up, sighing and looking quite angry. He marched over to me, took the phone, and informed Deidara that he'd be to get him in a few minutes and hung up.

"Could I come?" I asked Sasori hesitantly.

"I don't see why not," he answered in a short tone, and minutes later we had our shoes on and were on our way to pick up our friend. The radio was off and Sasori stepped on the peddles harshly, often jerking the car as we stopped and started. He was clearly fuming, and when we arrived at the corner of fifth street and dodge, I could see police lights slowly flashing, illuminating a half finished mural of a dove with an olive branch. We both slowly stepped out of the red Impala Sasori drove and showed our IDs to the cop, a tired looking man in his late thirties and a bad cough dressed in the classic blue police uniform. His badge labeled him as 'officer Hayate Gekko.'

"One of you is his next of kin?" The police man asked, looking behind him to the back of his squad car where Deidara sat. The blond paled and mouthed something like 'im not sorry' when he made eye contact with Sasori and the red head gave him a glare that could kill.

"I might as well be," Sasori muttered, the cop seemed irritated with the indefinite answer.

"He doesn't really have anyone like that," Sasori explained, " but I keep an eye on him."

"Apparently not very well. This is his third warning," the cop said very matter of factly, "I'm tempted to write him a ticket right now."

"Oh, he's just a kid you know?" I interjected, a nervous smile creeping on to my face with the tone of voice to match, but I was interrupted. Sasori shushed me and I stood down. He clearly wanted to handle this. The cop pulled out a pad of paper with copies of the city's standard vandalism citation notices, the ticket itself, and a pen.

"I'm sorry for the trouble he caused, I'm here to bring him directly home now. If the store owner would like, I'll have him paint over what he's done," Sasori said cooly, holding out his hand to take the unwritten citation.

"We called the city, turns out no one owns this building. I'm prepared to let him go with one last warning, but I want it in writing that he's gonna stay off the street," The officer coughed particularly hard as he went to retrieve Deidara. Before he let him out of the car, he gave him a stern talking to by the sound of it and got out another pad of paper. I thought he had been kidding about getting it down in writing, but we watched as the officer made him write out a promise to stop graffitiing and then reluctantly let him go.

"Back seat brat," Sasori commanded, turning around to get into the car. I waved to the police officer as a quick 'thank you' and fallowed them. We weren't in the car three seconds before Sasori began his lecture.

"This is the last time I'm bailing you out, your much too old for this. Honestly, I cannot believe that you'd still be out here, doing this at your age. I gave you a job, pay your rent and this is how I am repaid? I am not your father Deidara, I shouldn't have to act like it, " Sasori looked him dead in the eyes but Deidara looked like he might say something back, but he never did. I was going to reach out and give the kid a hug when Sasori turned and snapped at me too.

"Don't you dare try and coddle him," he said sternly and started the car, "where's that blasted idiot Tobi?"

"Home," Deidara said, frustrated. Sasori huffed and drove off, taking the highway home. I wished for just a second that I knew how they felt. I wished I understood why Sasori helped him with no obligation and why Deidara felt he needed to risk getting arrested for his art. It saw now that Deidara was entirely dependent on Sasori. His job, his car, his living situation, everything. If he really had been rich as some point, where was the money to back it up? Why in the world had Tobi just abandoned him when the cops came bothered me most of all. We returned home without further incident.

Sasori went up to bed as I double checked the door locks. I was coming through the kitchen to check the back door when I found the blond nineteen year old trying to leave again.

"You should probably stay in," I warned, he stopped and looked at me for a second, door still half open, as if no one had ever told him that before.

"What's it to you?" He spat, as if I had attacked him somehow. He clearly did not like being bossed around, or even given suggestions. He was an independent kid for sure.

"Nothing, I just thought maybe you'd stay in and watch a movie with me. I'm too scared to watch it alone," I said, meant to provoke him to think about what I was asking him. He'd be helping me by staying, his actions would mean something. I was sure that was exactly what he wanted.

"What movie?" He asked a few seconds later, his body posture visibly relaxing.

"Oh, uh, it's about ghosts, it's supposed to be really good," I smilied, looking away from him and fishing a bag of popcorn out of the drawer and sticking it in the microwave. I heard the door click shut and the lock snap after, and his easy footfalls on the hardwood floor lead into the living room. I ran up to my room and grabbed the lone DVD Id found while unpacking, how it's gotten mixed up in my stuff when I hated scary movies was beyond me.

Half an hour later I was hiding behind my hand as the people on the screen screamed, drenched in fake blood and bad movie make up.

"Oh my god this is horrible," Deidara laughed, shoving his mouth full of popcorn to finish off our second bowl. I volunteered to get up and get another.

"Hey, you know, Sasori asked about you the other day at work," Deidara caught me off guard, but I tried not to let him know that. A twinge of panic filled my head, why me? There are millions of other people, why me?

"Jesus your pale," he remarked as I sat down and looked away the TV and he continued speaking, "anyway, he asked me what you thought of his puppet thing, I told him you liked them. You did like them right?"

I nodded.

"Right. Well, okay, so then he asks me how old you are, but I told him I didn't know, but I bet he's still interested to know, I'll tell him if you tell me." The blonde was babbling a bit, but I didn't care. If he could watch a movie and talk I could talk and not watch the movie.

"Uh, I'm twenty two, and like, three fourths?" I replied. It was accurate, but I could tell Dei thought it was too technical.

"Tobi thinks you two would look cute together," Deidara snickered, "I still can't believe you puked on him."

I was never going to live that down was I?

"Why does everything in this house get around so fast? Do you people have nothing better to do than gossip?" I asked, Deidara burst into giggles. That was pretty much it, yeah.

"I heard Hidan went to a court hearing about child custody or something today. I guess he's got a baby mama, but she's like, in prison. If you asked me though, I think that's where he's headed. He's violent," the blonde shrugged after speaking, and took the bowl of popcorn from me. That didn't sound right to me, but then again I didn't know anyone in this house too well.

"I'm not gonna tell anybody, but, do you like, have an anxiety disorder?" Deidara's tone changed dramatically as he looked back at me from the popcorn. I wasn't sure how to answer him. I'd never been professionally diagnosed.

"It's basically panic attacks," I tried my best to explain without going in to what generalized anxiety and panic disorder was. I could sum it up best as constant fear. I was so afraid of getting sick I became a germaphobe, I was so afraid of authority figures I ran away instead of taking their words constructively, it wasn't just limited to Kakuzu. It was the reason I'd left my friend's apartment without their knowing, why I ran away from home without so much as saying good bye. I was afraid I'd fuck something up, so it was better to just stay passive and quiet, but flip out on the inside.

"Hey, sorry I asked, I didn't mean to upset you," he mumbled, and I reached out to hug him.

"You didn't upset me," I replied as he returned my embrace. Hugs made me sick. I hated to so much as even touch other people but they were customary displays of affection, so I did it anyway but reluctantly with my germaphobic tendencies. I pushed Dei away before I contracted any more germs.

The movie ended after and we went upstairs to bed, however as we tried to part in the hall way and I found myself staring into my dark, long staircase up to my room, I reached out to pull on his shirt before he could leave.

"You scared?" He laughed, I nodded. He was gone for a second, retrieving a blanket and he joined me upstairs. I took my side a let him have the other. We kept separate pillows, separate blankets, and we slept facing away from each other. That was more than okay, as long as the darkness wasn't going to eat me and we didn't touch, I didn't much care.

Sunday morning arrived and let me sleep in, it was probably eleven when I woke up, and I hauled myself out of bed to trot my ass down stairs.

When I entered the kitchen to get myself a drink of water, I found Kisame and Kakuzu sitting around while Sasori spoke in hushed tones on a cell phone. He looked at me seriously for a second and then ended his call.

"Have you see Deidara?" He asked him in a tone that conveyed he'd been looking for the blond all morning.

"Yeah, he was with me all night, I uh, I had a nightmare," I lied, but I sounded like a baby either way. Sasori heaved a heavy sigh of relief. "Why?" I asked but nobody responded.

"I suppose now we just have to go about finding Hidan," Kisame sighed and folded his arms.

"Deidara said something about him being in court yesterday for something about a baby?" I offered, getting myself my drink and sitting down at the table. Kakuzu gave me a dirty look and took the cell phone from Sasori. The phone hadn't even begun to ring when the man in question opened the door.

"There you are, you ass," Kakuzu growled, pushing something on the touch screen on the phone and setting it down, "your rents due today."

Hidan, scowling harder than I'd ever seen, took a wad of money out of his pocket and slammed it down on the table.

"I got a social worker coming in twenty minutes, don't fucking bug me," he snarled, took off his motorcycle jacket and after throwing it down, left the room to go upstairs. Kakuzu scoffed, counting the cash carefully.

"He paid off last months too," the accountant noted and shoved the money into his pocket. Life resumed after both the trouble makers had been found. Kisame wandered off after Sasuke, mumbling something about baby sitting, and Kakuzu went in to the office, leaving Sasori with me at the table. The red haired man pocketed his phone and examined his finger nails a moment before looking up at me.

"Deidara tells me you've been asking about me," he spoke calmly, his gaze bored and uncaring.

"He said the same about you," I replied. That little blond shit, what was he up to? Sasori smirked.

"Is that so?" He chuckled and stood up, leaving the room. I couldn't quite place what was happening.

I headed back up to my room to count what was left of my money to go shopping and roust Deidara, but a barricade of trash bags blocked my path. The door to Hidan's room was open, and I could see him inside bagging up a layer of trash on his floor. His walls were black with a large circle with a triangle inside painted red over his King sized bed. He had a ton of side tables of all different heights pushed up against the walls, a beat up dresser and over flowing closet, giving the room a personality to match it'd biker inhabitant.

"Um, this is a fire hazard," I spoke hesitantly, attracting the silver haired mans attention.

"Like I give a shit!" He shouted and went back to his task.

"Could I do anything to help get rid of this mountian? No one can get through," I murmured, now more so afraid of him after he'd snapped at me. I was forced to repeat myself, he hadn't been able to hear me the first time and told me so.

"Yeah, uh, that bag next to you has cloths in it. Take it down to the laundry for me?" He asked, his tone still just as firm up not as abusive. I complied and took the bags down stairs, not about to touch any of his germ ridden things in it. No sooner had set the bags down did I hear a knock at the door. I put a rush on my walking, this had to be the social worker.

"I'm here to see Hidan?"

"I'll get him, please come in," I smiled and let her inside. Hidan was down the steps seconds later, he'd changed into a clean, but wrinkled white shirt and slacks, complete with a belt and tie.

"Hi, Kushina, it's nice to see you," Hidan smiled. While they talked, I had a chance to look our guests over. Kushina wore a prim and proper suite, a black skirt and matching blazer that contrasted her burning red hair. If she worked at child services, I was glad to hear it with her cheerful personality. The baby was sleeping, wrapped in a soft pink blanket. She couldn't be very old, maybe eight months, with a tuft of black hair on her head.

After staring awkwardly at them in silence, I thought I might be being a little creepy and went off to make myself some tea. When I returned to the living room to sneak back upstairs, I easdropp on them talking about Hidan's job.

"Well um, I don't exactly have one but uh, um," he stuttered. I probably should have butted out, but I wanted to help him in a hands off sort of way. We both had a bad affliction for booze I understood and that motivated me.

"He helps me out," I chimed, bringing the attention to me. My genuine smile fell into a nervous crooked one, "he uh, helps me do stuff around here I can't do, haha, you know, too short to wash the crown molding. I'm the uh, house manager, so uh, you know, it's, it's gotta get done."

"I see," Kushina looked very interested as she looked down at some papers in her hand and then back to the silver haired man in question.

"Right, but I'm looking for another job," Hidan replied.

"Well, I'm going to skip the tour, my son Naruto comes over to see his friend, Sasuke who also happens to live in this building, so I'm sure it's fine, but moving on, who will be watching the baby while your looking for a job?" Hidan heaved a sigh of relief, but tensed up again as she continued on. He might as well have been sweating bullets.

"I will," I volunteered, raising my hand dorkishly, "I'm home all day."

It was quiet for a few seconds more until finally Kushina stood up and unceremoniously handed the baby to Hidan, telling him congratulations. I'd never seen an unmarried man so happy about a baby. I wasn't about to be getting anywhere near that little monstrosity though, so I opted to take care of the laundry after Kushina left. They puked all over, not to mention the germs, so I simply had to avoid the bouncy baby girl as her new guardian set up a crib. When Id finished with the laundry I took it up to his room where he was watching the baby sleep.

"Thanks uh, a bunch. You stuck your neck out for me," I head Hidan mutter as dumped the basket out on the closest clean surface. He'd probably wished I hadn't heard that.

"Now I'm nosey here, so let's get the record on this baby straight. You got some nasty rumors going around," I told him, holding the cloths basket on one hip and my hand on the other.

"She was my friends kid. Her dad died and her mom not doing too hot. Her names Mirai," Hidan sounded a little sad. What he didn't tell me is that he felt guilty for what happened to Mirai's parents. Asuma and Kurenai had been out with him, and they'd all been drinking. Asuma wrapped their car around a tree on the way home and landed them in the hospital with a confused baby sitter at home. Asuma died a few days later, but Kurenai was excepted to get better.

"We were buddies in high school is all. Her moms gonna come get her when she gets a chance though, it's not forever."

"Your gonna have to find a real baby sitter," I said very matter of factly and left the room, I hated kids and I hated the bacteria they carried, just because I said I would didn't mean I was actually going to baby sit. I was on my way back up stairs with another load of laundry for the hundredth time today (this time it was mine) when sleeping beauty started on his way down.

"Do you have any idea what time it is Deidara?" I asked, looking back at him as we passed.

"Two in the afternoon," he said a bit more cheerful than I liked. I rolled my eyes, teenagers. While distracted, and I really should have known, I managed to bump into none other than Sasori at the top of the steps.

"We've got to stop running into each other like this," I tried to half heartedly joke cracking a smilie, but he didn't think it was funny.

"Excuse me," he said so politely it sounded fake and moved around me.

"Uh, Sasori look," I started, but let my words die off. I didn't know what I wanted to say or how to say it. I excepted him to keep walking and ignore me. He stopped half way down the stares and looked at me with an expression I couldn't read.

"What is it?" He asked, but I had no answer. "Alright then. When you get the knot out of your tongue I'll be downstairs."

"Wait, I um," I started again to catch his attention but it just served to agitate him.

"Spit it out!" He ordered.

"Tobi thinks Miss Kimi is trying to ask you out to dinner! I'm completely sure if it!" Tobi's shrill fake voice filled the air as he bounded into the room, pulling a Deidara with him. The blonde might as well of been in stitches. I tried again to stammer out an excuse, a reason, anything, but Sasori quieted the room with his commanding, impatient voice.

"You should have just asked then," the red head spoke, his tone leveling and calming after pausing, "be down stairs at five thirty."

He continued his way down the steps and turned the corner into the hall way. I heard the office door open and shut, and vaguely I could hear Kakuzu's voice through the wall. The 'children' at the end of the steps had gotten pretty quiet, like they hadn't expected that to happen. They both took one look at me and scattered.

I stood still a while longer, my mind racing on what exactly I should do about this. I didn't want to go out to dinner, I didn't want to be anywhere alone with Sasori. I was frozen in my own body, unable to move my legs our lips. My anxiety was mounting, like it had climbed every step on this stairway, gaining strength as it went until it swallowed me whole. I struggled not to hyperventilate as I turned around quickly and fast walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. I leaned against the wall, my vision closing in.

This was going to end in disaster, I was going to be embarrassed, I was going to get hurt, I was going to get fired for this some way or another. All these irrational thoughts suddenly became very possible in my twisted worry world. I wasn't sure how long it had gone on when I finally forced myself to get a grip.

"Take a deep breathe," I said out loud and I did so, "another," I commanded, and it went on like that until I finally got ahold of myself.

Exhausted, I finally stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. My face was red and my pupils were still dilated, but I wasn't hurt and I wasn't dead most importantly. Took a long shower to relieve any left over tension and got dressed after, in clean cloths. If I couldn't object to the plans that had been made for me, I could at least look decent. I combed my shirt blonde hair to the left, putting a curl in the body and flips on the ends as I asked myself why I didn't do my hair more often, only to remember why. I was yet still afraid of being embarrassed. If I hadn't forcibly made myself leave it alone, I probably would have straightened it back out.

I was ready at five forty four and so was Sasori. As soon as we closed the car doors, he turned to me.

"I'm not entirely sure what's happening, but I'm inclined to think Deidara is trying to set us up. I decided to humor him this once, however, I'd like you to know this outing has no meaning what so ever."

"T-that's fine. That's more than fine, actually, that's great," I replied and he seemed to like how I answered him.

"Where would you prefer to eat?" He asked, starting the car and backing out, trying to weasel around the other tenant's cars.

"I like Mexican?" I offered so Mexican it was then. Truth be told it was nice to get out of the house, though it was out of my comfort zone, and Sasori was pleasant to be around. We were seated and ordered our food in a timely fashion. I had to order something I could eat with my hands. I didn't use other people's silver wear.

"Thanks um, for going along with this anyway," I smiled, stirring my water with my straw.

"No problem," he returned, his gaze lazy and and his russet colored eyes looking uninterested.

"I would have thought you would have been working or something," I noted, he shook his head.

"No, on Sundays I usually work on my puppets, but today I'm out to dinner," he replied very seriously. I felt a little bad.

"You should have said, you could have done that instead," I offered but he shrugged it off.

"It's not always good to be ingrained into a routine," he stated. I smiled gently and he cracked a smirk. Our food came right after.

We left it at that and ate in silence. We chatted about useless things and went home. Returning to my room I found Deidara sitting in the middle of my bed, which he'd made.

"Well?" He asked, snickering under his breathe.

"It's not becoming of a lady to let on," I smirked and his face fell.

"No fair!" He exclaimed.

"Let this be a lesson then," laying down on my bed and using my socked foot to push him off. He caught himself before he fell on his behind and looked back at me before leaving the room. What a little weasel I thought, but whatever. He'd given me a nice night at his own expense. I figured he'd be getting his ass chewed out again by Sasori as soon as he saw him next. I put away a couple drinks before inspecting the blond's work on my bed, and dubbed it clean enough to sleep under.

This had been a long first week, and that was fine because I was looking foreword to many more.


	5. Chapter 5

Days passed in and out with the seemingly revolving front door. Like a factory, people came in and went out on schedule, like they were on a time card with forty hours standing in front of them. My job was easy now that Id caught up with the house work and Id even been trusted to make budgets for the household myself and help our not so friendly accountant with his job too.

The first few nights with the baby had been pretty sleepless, Mirai cried most of the night, but we'd all benefited from her. The silver haired biker was quieter, much quieter, and he no longer left and came home at odd hours of the night or blasted death metal music at oh my god o' clock.

Sasori remained himself, distant and quiet, and I remained myself, away from him.

I was pretty used to sleeping in late and going to bed after far too many drinks far too late at night, so when I was rudely awoken at five in the morning on a Thursday, I wasn't exactly happy.

"Who the hell is it?" I groaned, turning back over to pull the covers over my head, but the blanket was ripped off of me a second time.

"It's Tobi, listen, uh, Deidara needs your help. He and Hidan got into it," Tobi spoke in his normal voice, his tone apprehensive and hushed.

"Take him to the hospital, I'm not a doctor," I muttered, putting my arm over my eyes to block out my bedroom light.

"It's not that bad, he needs somebody that's not me to calm him down before he destroys my aunt and uncles house," Tobi responded, pulling on my arm. Heaving a heavy sigh, I sat up. I immediately tried to cover myself up, not wanting Tobi to see me in my pajamas even though they weren't revealing. He left the room and so did I after getting dressed.

We tracked across the back yard, the dew making my bare feet sort of itch as I crossed the threshold and walked up Tobi's back porch. I hadn't even bothered to look at Hidans door, but the first thing I noticed was that he was nowhere to be found. The second thing I noticed the the incredible state the house was in, that is, it was spotless. Hadn't Deidara supposedly destroyed it?

"Tobi what's going on here?" I asked, refusing to go any further than the sliding back door that was located in the home's kitchen.

"Nothing, we just wanted to talk to you," Tobi sneered, he after hearing his friends voice, Deidara waved at me from the other room.

"What's this about?" I asked, backing away, but I bumped into the door behind me. My nerves were almost always shot, but this situation was heading further south. Tobi rolled his eyes.

"Jesus Christ, calm down, nothing's gonna happen. I've got a little proposition for you, that's all."

"what kind of proposition?" I asked, my eyes still wide with almost fear.

"It's nothing big, don't worry," he lay a hand on my shoulder and guided me into the living room. I quickly shrugged his hand off, but took a seat on the sofa. I smoothed the wrinkles in my capris as the guys poured me a glass of half flat Mountain Dew, and it became evident the pair had been up all night. I was still a ball of nerves, like a million rubber bands about to break. I asked again what it was I was doing here.

"Well, uh, I was wondering how your date with Sasori went," Tobi replied, and I knew exactly where this was going.

"Ohh no, I'm not about to kiss and tell," I answered.

"You kissed him?" Deidara asked excitedly, both horribly immature boys on the edge of their seats.

"Figure of speech," I rolled my eyes, "besides, he said it didn't mean anything. Plus he's really not my type," I muttered, wringing my hands as Tobi got up, and retrieved a Manila envelope from a nearby table. When he returned, he handed it to me and motioned for me to open it.

"Sure he is, he's your type to a T. As much as he hates to draw things out, he just loves to hear himself talk, and you," Tobi snorted, "your opposites. I swear your too perfect for each other."

I tried not to listen as I carefully undid the clasp holding the top flap down and then looked inside before dumping the contents in my lap. More than a dozen pieces of paper fell out of all different sizes, some brightly colored others more monochromatic, and glancing over them, I realized they were wedding invitations.

"I don't usually show people this sort of thing, but I figured you'd have to trust me before you just went along with my plan," Tobi leaned over and dug a pastel blue invitation out of the pile, on it were two vaguely familiar faces. "That's my aunt, Konan. I set her up with Nagato, all though a bad pizza delivery scam."

"What does this have to do with me?" I asked, furrowing my eyebrows.

"Everything, if you want it to. I think you and fire crotch would be really happy together."

"What?! No! Jesus, what? You can't, you can't just, do that to people! You can't just, screw with people's love lives!" I exclaimed, packing the wedding invitations back into the envelope.

"A simple no would have been fine," he sighed, and took it back from me. The wheals in my head still turned and I thought to ask a question.

"How did you just, get all these people married? Like, how...?"

"I understand chemistry," he smirked, "I have a zero percent divorce rate."

"What about you though?" I questioned, looking down into my lap. Jesus this guy was a psychopath!

"I'm Happier alone," he answered, sitting back on the couch and folding his right leg over the left, "but back to you. Your sure you don't want to go though with it?" It's not like you couldn't back out if you decided you didn't like him, besides, 'just' another friend wouldn't hurt would it?" He flashed me a smile and folded his arms confidently across his chest, "I can guarantee you won't get hurt."

"Are you bribing me?" I asked, taking a sip of my drink after examining the cup for cleanliness.

"Do you want me to bribe you?" He asked, but laughed it off after. I couldn't tell if he was joking or not. "Just go on another, say, two dates with him, humor me."

And that was how I ended up walking my sorry ass across the back yard to get myself ready for the day. Deidara joined me with a small piece of paper in his hand. We parted at the steps, and he headed outside to tape 'my' date invitation to Sasori's car.

There was just no avoiding it, Tobi refused to take no for an answer. I thought he was going to get up, seize my shoulders and shake me silly if I didn't comply. So as I dressed for the day, all I could think about was what people would say. I supposed that it was more anxiety than anything, I always felt like people were judging me.

Shrugging it off for the time being, I got an early start on things, I began by checking all my chore/schedule sheets and the cleanliness of the refrigerator, then I checked the status of the living room, and lastly I walked into the office to snoop around in the expense and revenue reports just to pretend like I was busy.

Kakuzu returned home early, much to my distain, but I hadn't left anything for him to yell at me about. I turned in my two week meal plan and kicked back on the couch until the tenants came home. They followed their usual order, and I stayed on the couch until Sasori walked into the door.

"Hi," I greeted lamely, twisting around to look at him as he kicked off his shoes. Deidara hadn't followed him in and I thought that odd.

"What is the meaning of this?" He asked, presenting the note that'd been left on his car. He seemed mildly offended, his cold gaze set on me. I flashed him a sheepish smile.

"I thought I articulated that I do not wish to pursue a relationship," he continued, looking slightly annoyed now.

"I was listening," I muttered, my smile becoming more of a nervous expression than a bashful one. I tried to handle this exactly how Tobi inducted me. Sasori evaluated me for another moment before he sighed.

"Can't you pick some other poor, younger man to bother?"

"Well, uh, you see," I stuttered, "I just um, I liked the way that, uh," I paused for a moment to remember my coaching, "it's just for fun. Nothing serious."

The red head sighed once more left the room, going upstairs with an apple after briefly stopping in the kitchen. I hadn't gotten a straight answer out of him, but he also hadn't said no. So I sat back on the couch and tried not to let the crushing nervous feeling I had get the best of me.

I watched Hidan come down stairs next toting his little screaming responsibility close to his chest.

"I need help," he nearly screamed over the baby's cries, "she won't stop."

I shrugged, "not my problem."

"The hell it isn't! I need help," He repeated. He looked tired, bags under his eyes and cloths seeming more wrinkled than usual.

"Did you change her, or feed her, or, I dunno what do babies need?" I asked, standing up to look at the baby. Her face was red and tear streaked.

"Yeah, I did all that, God fucking christ, make her stop your a woman!" He shouted, shoving her into my arms. Well fuck, now what? I tried rocking her a little and bouncing her, but I was a stranger and I only made her cry harder. Hidan and I were too focused on Mirai to notice Kakuzu leave the office and join us in the living room.

"When was the last time she had a nap?" The accountant asked, scaring the shit out of me and offering to take the child. I complied and he bounced her a bit harder. She was still just as upset, but the bouncing distracted her, so her cries quieted.

"I dunno, she just kinda passes out when she's ready," Hidan answered and Kakuzu shook his head.

"Go lay her down and get a warm bottle, she needs a nap you idiot," the accountant replied and I snuck away into the kitchen to call in something for dinner and then upstairs before they started arguing. At first I was headed to my bedroom, but Sasori's door caught my eye. He'd left it ajar again, and I thought to close it for him despite it not working out the first time.

I reached for his door handle and just as my fingers brushed it, it was jerked from my grip. Sasori stood in the now open doorway, his expression interested. It was almost as if he'd baited me.

"Could I help you?" He asked, his tone bored and body expression tired.

"No, I was just going to shut your door for you," I said, a bit more confident than Id thought I was able to muster. He studied me a moment before he opened the door further and stepped out of the way.

"Come in for just a moment."

"Sure," I replied, stepping in. I didn't move much farther into the room than the door. I wanted to make a quick escape if necessary. I took just a second to survey the room, not a single thing was out of place, the carpet a dark brown and the furnishings dark wood. He had a single curtain pulled and the bed properly made, giving the room a uniquely lit and distinguished feeling. He left the door to sit down at a small cherry wood desk, spinning around in his executive chair to look at me. We regarded each other for a second more before he spoke.

"Deidara is pressuring you into this," he stated, pulling the note from his pants pocket, "this is in his hand writing, not yours."

"I had him write it for me?" I shrugged and gave him another sheepish smile.

"Tobi is in on it too isn't he?" Sasori sighed.

"Well no um, it's not a big deal, I mean," I sputtered, slightly afraid of what Tobi would do if he found out Sasori knew about the plan, but I was sure he'd be much more aggressive about it. Sasori shook his head.

"I suppose I'll have a talk with them," he responded a bored expression reclaiming his features, "I'll go ahead and tell him we won't be going on any further 'dates.' "

"Great," I smiled and I excused myself as fast as I could while still being polite. Tobi was going to kill me for fucking this up! I calmly left the room and climbed the steps after telling Sasori good bye and once up the steps to my room and slammed the door behind me to clutch my aching side as panic set in. I felt like I couldn't breathe again, but counting seconds, breathing in my mouth and out my nose, I persuaded myself to calm down. I needed a drink, and bad. I pulled my bottle of vodka from the shelf and used a cup Id been keeping upside down (to prevent germs ) on the neck of the bottle, and proceeded to pour myself a drink, and then another, and another.

I needed to figure something out to tell Tobi to prevent him from making my life worse, I needed an excuse or something and I though that all while pressing my lips to my cup again only to find it was empty. Well this was certainly another problem larger than the one that persisted in my head, and needed to be righted straight away.

I tripped my way down both flights of stairs, thankfully not falling before I found Deidara sitting at the kitchen table eating the Thai food I'd ordered for the house earlier. He saw me before I said anything, and the longer he looked at me, the stranger his look became.

"Are you okay? Your face is all red," he asked, his speech impediment catching on his last word.

" 'm fine," I slurred, tripping over my words like I had my feet moments ago.

"Are you drunk?" He asked, putting down his fork. I shook my head no.

"I'm not, I just need to go to Walgreens" I replied, speaking slower to get my words out clearer. "Would you ask, um, um," I stuttered.

"Did you want me to ask Tobi?" He asked again, furrowing his eyebrows, I nodded. Kill two birds with one stone.

"You can go with me," he said, getting up and offering to hold my hand. I didn't understand why until he pulled me away from a wall I hadn't perviously seen in my path. I felt like everything, including my feet, were shifted to the right. I had a hard time slipping on my sandals, and that seemed strange to me because didn't they just slip on? I didn't get a chance to get mad at them though, Deidara kicked them to the side a little, accidentally he claimed, and I managed to get them on. I didn't think it strange the accident happened twice in a row.

"What's wrong with my feet?" I muttered, tripping once more over the grass as we crossed yards for the second time that day. In reality I knew exactly what was wrong with my feet.

"Grass is kinda long," my blonde friend reassured, pulling on me once again to stop me from wandering off into Tobi's aunt's flower bed. I couldn't feel my face at his point, but putting my hands on my cheeks they felt flushed. Deidara sat me down on a step and went in to get Tobi, leaving me to muse about what time it was exactly and why my fingers were so pink. By now I'd completely forgotten about my fuck up earlier.

I didn't hear the door open or the foot steps on the deck, but I did feel Tobi tap my shoulder. He offered me a hand which I needed to get up and they both helped me into the back seat of the car, sitting suspiciously on a towel with another under my feet.

"Walgreens?" The dark haired man asked me, and nodding I felt sort of like a bobble head. I didn't look out the window because I knew I'd get car sick, so I starred at my apparently very interesting feet, watching them warp and spin to the right.

"What 're youso quiet for?" I asked the men in the front seat, not able to look up, and neither answered me. I was reminded that Id lost all track of time when we stopped quite suddenly. We'd arrived. I reached for the door handle but the car locked before I could opened it.

"Whats the deal?" I asked, getting tangled in my seat belt as I tried to remove it.

Tobi climbed out of the car quickly, leaving it running and his friend in the front seat, "Deidara says you drink vodka? I'll go in and get it for you."

I watched him hoof it into the store and disappear. What seemed like hours later he reappeared with two grocery bags, however I wasn't allowed access to them until I agreed Id stay over a while. Social drinking was better than drinking alone, so when we found our way back to Tobi's house, I parked myself on the sofa.

Deidara was young, skinny and short, giving him a low tolerance level, so after his third shot and fifteen minutes, he slurred his words worse than I did. I tried not to pay any attention to him, taking my own shots and watching the ever suspicious Tobi who for whatever reason wasn't drinking. He held a cell phone in his hand, casually checking it for text messages and a package of instant ramen cooking on the stove for his own dinner.

"Tobi holy shit! Your not still on about that are you?!" Deidara exclaimed quite suddenly, climbing over the back of the couch, and by extension me, only to end up on the floor. He was quick to pick himself up though, sitting cross legged and leaning on my leg. Was it just me or was my vision getting clearer?

"I'm not," Tobi smiled, putting his phone down in sort of a sheepish way.

"You are! Oh, oh, Kimi, Kimi, Tobi is sad about his ex-girlfriend!" Deidara stated, his speech impediment combined with his drunken state making his words harder to understand. I had to ask him two more times what he meant before I got it all. I didn't much care about Tobi's ex-girlfriend and I shouldn't contribute to it I decided, so leaning back on the plush couch I let my head roll to the side.

"Tobi who do you live here with?" I asked. He was about to respond when three things happened in time with each other to prevent it. First, the smoke alarm went off. The noodles on the stove had boiled off all of the water and the pot began to smoke. By the time we could smell it, it was too late. The next thing to happen was the car alarm going off. The keys had somehow ended up on the floor and as Tobi got up, he managed to step on them. The last thing to happen was the horrible sound of the flat screen TV mounted on the wall exploding. For no reason at all it seemed, the screen cracked, the circuits fried and the whole thing fell off the wall sending Deidara into a fit of laughter.

I thought I should probably do something, so after standing up and steadying myself, I unplugged the TV and opened a few windows. I opened the sliding glass back door last, letting the smoke billow out it as I tried to access the damage. Tobi was running the steaming pot under a stream of cold water in the sink, the bottom red as the stove. It wasn't too bad, no fire, the pot hadn't melted to the stove, so we seemed pretty okay except for the burnt noodles covering the floor. I supposed Deidara must have found the keys because the car alarm stopped abruptly and all was quiet except for the sound of the water hissing as it became steam. I went to pour myself another drink in the living room when I noticed the label on the bottle.

"You've been giving me nonalcoholic vodka? Where did you even get this stuff?" I asked. I was more surprised than I was angry, but I was pretty angry. How had I not noticed? Was I that far gone?

"Only for the past three hours," Tobi called from the kitchen. I looked at the clock now that I had the majority of my barring, it read eleven. If Id started drinking before dark at eight, that'd been more than enough time to sober up. Rasping on the back door stopped me from arguing with him any further. I turned around to watch Sasori let himself in the screen door and survey the room.

"Before you give me another one of your convoluted stories Tobi, I'm going to ask you once and only once to keep it down," the red head seethed. Oh Jesus I though watching them from the living room, he couldn't know Deidara was drunk, he'd probably fire him or something, so I decided to make myself a distraction.

"Sorry Sasori, uh, it was my fault the car alarm went off," I cut in to draw attention to myself, "reached my hand in the open window. Just a couple, uh, unfortunate events," I laughed nervously, putting on a smile to match. He regarded me for just a second before Tobi butted in.

"Miss kimi was just leaving too! Why don't you walk her home?" Tobi screeched in that horrible fake voice of his.

"Because I'm not going home. Hidan's," he paused for a second to find the right word, " _ward_ is having a bad night_," _ he said very matter of factly. I assumed that meant Mirai was back screaming her head off.

"Oh oh! Tobi's bed time is right now! I'm gonna take Deidara and go upstairs! Miss Kimi and Mr Sasori are welcome to sleep in the living room!" Tobi sort of giggled after he spoke, and I'd never seen anything so corny or fake in my life. He was gone a moment later, taking Deidara and childishly dashing up the stairs.

"I thought I'd get as much from him," Sasori sighed, "you should pay more attention to the company you keep."

"I'll remember that," I muttered. I got myself a drink of water in attempt to ward off a hang over headache and settled down in the arm chair since Sasori had stolen the couch. He propped his torso up on the arm but stretched his legs out, looking at his nails with with a bored expression. If Id known he was going to be this much fun, I would have saved myself the trouble of getting the water. With no tv to watch, I decided the answer to this problem was to drink until I fell asleep. I'd downed my first shot of vodka, the real vodka Deidara had been drinking, when I realized I had his attention.

"I didn't know you drank," he remarked. I sort of laughed at him and took another shot.

"Want some?" I offered, pulling a highlighter orange shot glass from the pile of plastic disposable ones and poured him a drink regardless of what the response was going to be because one of us would drink it. I could see the gears in his head turning. I knew there was a rumor going around I was a heavy drinker and I could tell Sasori hadn't wanted to believe it. I think he might have pitted me or maybe he was discussed, I couldn't tell. To my surprise though, he picked up the shot and swallowed it. I could see the discomfort on his face so I handed him my water.

"Take another, let's have a contest," I suggested, smiling and feeling sort of dopey.

"You've got a higher tolerance than I do, you'll win," he pointed out, but I poured him a second shot anyway and a third for myself. I shrugged and agreed with myself to stop counting after that.

"what do you think they're doing up there?" I asked, looking up at the ceiling as if I might see something. He looked up too.

"I haven't the slightest. They're quiet and that's all that matters," Sasori muttered and sipped his drink instead of swallowing it. He was smaller than I was, but stocky, so I figured if he was going to get drunk it'd be in the next few drinks.

"You've been drinking before this?" He asked, I nodded. He poured himself another drink and it was quiet for a while as the alcohol took a hold of both of us, driving us to drink more. I got up to pee finally and found myself falling over and catching myself on Sasori's shoulder. I grinned at him and he stood up to help me, but when he fell, he brought me down with him on the couch.

"This is embarrassing," I muttered and he acted as if he hadn't heard me.

"Earlier, when I said we wouldn't be seeing each other, you looked bothered," he pointed out, and I didn't have a clear enough head to tell him it was Tobi's fault. I shrugged and tried to get off of him, but he seized my wrists and pulled me back down, the next thing I knew I was kissing him.

I let my eyes drift close and my arms snake around his shoulders. He did the same and we pulled each other closer, working our lips together like tomorrow would never come. He was so soft and warm, I couldn't believe I'd kissed him until I pulled away gasping for air. It felt like a hundred degrees between us but this hot summer night probably came in somewhere around seventy-nine.

"Your so cool, you always act so cool," I remarked, panting softly. Why had I never noticed how beautiful his eyes were or how perfect his skin was? He ran his hands down my sides, feeling each curve before his hands came to rest on my hips. He look at me, his mouth slightly open as if he wanted to speak but couldn't. I closed my eyes and kissed him again, running my tongue on his bottom lip. I felt light headed and heavy bodied as he returned my advances, pressing his tongue against mine. He rubbed a hand on the small of my back and I fisted my hand in his hair, writing my name into his mouth over and over as he did the same to me. It was his turn to pull away then, and we both had to catch our breathes.

"I've got to work tomorrow," he whispered and I nodded. He turned on his side and efficiently dumped me off of him in favor of laying next to him. My back pressed up against his chest and his hand still resting on my hip. I was warm, almost too warm, but I was happy too.

* * *

So, if your thinking "Why does she just keep doing what Tobi says? Why does it matter?" its because of Kimi's anxiety! Shes so worried about him and what he might do, she just goes along with it. That also goes along with why shes so germaphobic and why she doesn't seem to have much of a personality.

later chapters though! stay tuned!


	6. Chapter 6

I was not surprised Sasori was gone the next morning. He did have work and he had mentioned it that night. I elected to lay there a while longer and think about what I'd done. Starring up at the ceiling I decided that I hadn't meant to kiss him, and he probably hadn't meant to kiss me. That was that and nothing more. We were drunk and that was excuse enough. It wouldn't have been the first time Id done something I regretted while I was drunk. I could just move on now, not say anything to him and move on. He probably didn't remember it anyway, he had a much lower tolerance he said it himself.

If there was nothing to worry about, I reasoned, then why was it still bothering me?

My chest felt heavy, like my nerves had coiled like a ball of snakes and threatened to burst from my chest I was so nervous.

Tobi wandered downstairs next, shirtless with a towel slung around his neck like he'd just gotten out of the shower but his hair wasn't wet. I didn't ask.

"Want some breakfast?" He asked, examining the table for rings the glasses had made last night or imperfections in the finish. I shook my head.

"I'm sick," I croaked, and I certainly felt sick. He disappeared into the kitchen for a second and I heard the water run before he returned with a cup and a pitcher of water.

"Hangovers are caused by dehydration," he smiled, setting it down in front of me. How could he still be so happy?

"Who do you live here with?" I asked once more. This room was trashed with the blown out TV, the disposable plastic cups and shot glasses littering the floor and I supposed the decorating style didn't look much like his doing, unless he really liked flowers.

"I live here with my aunt and uncle, Konan is my mother's sister," he replied, sitting down next to my feet and running his hand though his bed head. How old did that make him?

"I play the system, I pretend to be an idiot so I don't have to make anything of myself," he continued as if he knew what I was thinking, "I'm twenty five, and I've never had a job. My parents just hand me money because I'm an embarrassment to them, I suppose, but it's all part of my plan. I'll straighten out once I get my inheritance. I'm grandpas favorite," he snickered, looking over at me with a devilish smilie.

"Your psychotic," I said bluntly, but he wasn't offended. I supposed that explained a lot, his parents wouldn't have to deal with him here, but we did. He shrugged and disappeared back into the kitchen, minutes later I heard bacon frying.

I was content to lay on his couch all day and drink water and never think about going home until I realized I too had to work today. Begrudgingly I left and trotted my sorry ass back to the boarding house. I swore it looked like it was going to swallow me whole as walked though the looming back door.

The house looked like a bomb went off and Hidan sat in the middle. He sported a black eye and sat with the baby on the floor, spread out on the floor with blankets, bottles and toys. The rest of the house was worse, like he was the epicenter. Papers were spewn around and a chair sat propped up in the corner, standing only on three legs. Some cups were broken and a plate lay in ruin next to the garbage instead of in it.

"What the fuck happened?" I asked, restraining myself from shouting and scaring Mirai.

"Kakuzu and me got in a fight. Hey, will you watch her while I go have a smoke?" He responded, and my jaw almost hit the floor.

"No I will not watch her so you can smoke!"

"Why?" He snorted, " you gotta clean this shit anyway."

"No way, my job description is light housework and meal planning. Do it yourself," I seethed. Like hell I was gonna clean up his mess. I then proceeded to drag myself upstairs, grab my money out of my bedroom and leave again, going back over to Tobi's to throw myself back onto his couch.

"Honey, your home," he jested, and if looks could kill, he would have been dead.

He was in the process of cleaning up his broken television and on the phone with the company a short time after, apparently he and his powers of persuasion were trying to get another for free. I listened to him talk for a while until I finally rolled over, facing down. I wondered just what the hell was wrong with me that I thought it was just okay to get drunk and kiss people. Sasori probably never wanted to speak to me again. Wait just one damn minute here, why did I care? It wasn't like I was in love with him or anything. This was all his fault. My fingers twitched, and my chest still felt heavy, I was fortunate I hadn't panicked yet.

"Tobi," I said I to the couch, twisting my head around to repeat it again once I was sure he was off the phone, "I know you said to humor you but I can't do it. This is killing my nerves."

"If your a hundred percent sure," he sighed, "what'd you two do last night that made you change your mind?"

I shook my head. I didn't want to tell him.

"You guys have sex? Eww, jesus, now I need a new couch," he smirked.

"Oh screw you! No, we just kissed," I sighed. Oh whatever, he knew he was going to get it out of me regardless.

"Figures, he likes you, but I knew that before he did," He returned, plopping down in the chair next to the couch, "I dunno, he's a hard nut to crack. Keep at him."

"Tobi I can't, you can't force me into this," I sat straight up, my tone accusing and harsh.

"I'm not forcing you. I never said anything bad would happen to you didn't want to participate," he shrugged, "but whatever, I'll tell Deidara to cancel what we set you guys up tonight. It's the poor guys birthday."

"Is it really his birthday or are you screwing with me?" I had to ask. This was too good to be true.

"No, really, and he hates birthdays. He wouldn't have mentioned it to anyone either so, I mean," Tobi pulled out his cell phone and started on a text message when I cut him off.

"Fork over the money and I'll go, jesus, do you have no manners?" I scowled. Okay so I wouldn't cancel tonight, Id cancel the next one. Just like Id asked, he handed me sixty dollars in cash and I pocketed it.

"He'll appreciate it," Tobi smiled, and as if on cue, a truck pulled into the drive way and we spent the rest of the afternoon installing his new television that looked suspiciously like the old one. I had no idea what time it was until Deidara walked in the back door and found me tangled in cords, reading an instruction manual. Tobi had gone upstairs to watch the tv in his room, bored of our task. I wasn't sure how I'd ended up doing this.

"Need any help?" The blonde offered, kneeling down to pull a thick black cord from around my chest and shoulders. He then proceeded to plug it in and the step Id been puzzling over made sense now. He sat down this time, taking the instructions from me. I rolled my eyes, he hadn't even waited for my answer. I noticed Deidara had wore his long hair down today, parting in the back it to lay across his shoulders and cover his neck. In the time Id known him, I'd never seen down.

"What's with your hair?"

He jumped about a foot and his cheeks flushed a light pink.

"Oh, nothing, I couldn't find my hair tie this morning to go to work," he lied though his teeth.

"Let me help you," I smirked, pulling the tie out of my own hair and standing up. I brushed the cords off of me and they fell in a heap at my feet. I was already pulling his back when he started protesting, but I wouldn't hear it.

"No, really it's fine, I've got a million ties back home," I assured. I'd just looped the black elastic when I noticed exactly what he'd been hiding. The blonde sported a massive, dark hickey on the left side of his neck, and two more smaller ones on the right. He was quick to cover the one on the left, using his free hand to cover his face with the manual.

"It's not what you think," he muttered, embarrassed.

"What? You hooking up with that girl from the store? Jesus, don't worry. I won't tell Sasori, he'd probably kill you," I laughed a little and patted his head. Sasori probably would kill him for dating his niece too.

"Oh, oh yeah, uh, yeah," he stuttered, the flush leaving his cheeks, "thanks for not uh, telling."

"Don't mention it," I sighed, sitting back down with the cords and stealing the manual back.

"Don't you have to go get ready?" Deidara asked innocently and I looked up at him once more.

"I'm not dressing up, and I'm not putting on make up, this isn't a date," I told him very matter of factly.

"You usually wear make up," he pointed out, and I sighed. I supposed fixing myself up a little wouldn't hurt. I headed home and found a thin cardigan to put over my tank top, I braided my hair to the side and put on some foundation. After giving Kisame the task of ordering dinner for tonight, Sasori came down the steps.

I paled.

Up until now, I hadn't been nervous, but as his eyes settled on me and every step he took brought him closer my stomach dropped. My knees buckled and my fingers twitched, the familiar ache in my side returning. All of this on top of my hang over made me think I might puke.

"If your ready," he said, scowling. I could only nod as my mouth went dry and my breathe caught in my throat. The next thing I knew I was sitting shotgun with no idea how Id gotten there. The car was silent, not even the news radio Sasori liked was on.

We were currently on the highway, moving slowly to our destination. Traffic was backed up for miles and from our current position on top of an over pass, it looked like there was an accident up ahead. The car crept foreword until it finally stopped, and Sasori decided we were probably going to be here for a while, throwing the car in park and heaving a heavy sigh.

"This day just keeps getting better and better," he muttered, leaning back on his leather seat and resting his hands on his thighs. I wasn't going to say anything, but I thought maybe I should.

"What happened?" I asked meekly, my voice barely stable enough to speak. He looked over at me and sighed again.

"Nothing worth mentioning," he replied and it was quiet for a while longer.

"I suppose we aren't going to be to dinner any time soon, and I hate to wait. Here is as good a place as any, what did you want to talk about?" He asked, raising a hand to examine his nails.

"Nothing, why?" I questioned, furrowing my eyebrows, but then I realized, "today isn't your birthday is it?"

"My birthday is in November," he returned, and sighed for the third time, realizing what was happening too, " I warned you about the company you keep."

"Yeah, well you fell for it too," I muttered and looked away from him. I thought I heard him stifle a laugh.

"So I did," he said, the ghost of a smirk set on his features. The car was quiet for a while longer before traffic started moving again. The car felt like it was closing in on me as we approached our exit, and I thought I might have a heart attack as we arrived at our destination. We seated ourselves in this little hole in the wall Italian place and our drinks came quickly.

I couldn't seem to make sense of the menu in my impaired state so I decided to just order whatever Sasori ordered. I picked nervously at my fingernails and my legs twitched under the table, not aware that I had attracted attention to myself.

"Am I that intimidating?" Sasori asked, pulling me out of my self induced, closed off state of mind. I was horrified.

"No, no, no, no, it's not you," I stuttered, "people make me nervous."

He seemed to conciser it a second before he pulled out his phone and started a text message. I didn't think anything of it until he got a return message, I heard it ding, and asked me if I'd like to go with him to meet a friend of his after dinner. I didn't want to inconvenience him, I could just stay in the car after all, so I agreed.

We ordered and waited on our food, the night before never coming up in conversation. I paid with Tobi's money after but we sat a while longer, picking over fettuccine Alfredo and light conversation topics. I thought maybe Tobi was right, Sasori did like me. I was starting to think maybe I liked him too, maybe.

"No way, I don't know how you could stand it," I smiled, and it was my turn to stifle a laugh.

"I don't know how I did, Deidara was covered in paint, my nephews were pulling wood shaving out of there hair for days, and Temari's boyfriend never set foot in the door again," he smiled back. He had sort of an unhappy smile, like his face refused to let him express his joy.

His phone dinged again and he expressed that it was time to leave, that his friend was getting impatient. We got back into the car and headed further into the suburbs.

This time as we rolled up to a house, about twenty minutes away from home, the radio was on. Sasori got out and came around to my side, opening the door like a gentleman and ruining my plan to stay in the car. The house was immaculate, and fairly large for the suburbs. The door was painted a deep purple to match the trim around the windows, perfectly manicured grass meet a cobblestone path that lead up to the door, lit by solar lights.

"This is my friend's home, his name is Orochimaru. I'll ask you not to mention the teenagers running around, he's a foster parent and very touchy about them," Sasori instructed, knocking on the door. I kept my mouth shut in fear of angering or disturbing him, though I knew it was irrational.

I recognized the red headed girl that opened the door as Sasuke's girlfriend, though I realized we'd never actually meet. She let us in and screamed though the house for her foster father and left for the living room where she resumed fighting with her foster brother over the television. Orochimaru decided the modest sized stare case and smiled. His black hair flowed to almost his thin waist and he wore a very tight fitting plum colored shirt, a single ear ring dangling from his right ear. He looked almost feminine as he approached us, and his voice did not help his case.

"What a pleasure it is to meet you," he grinned, sauntering over to kiss my hand. It was meant to seem charming, but I thought it creepy.

"It's wonderful that you've came, but tell me, Sasori, what do I owe the visit?" He sneered in a way that reminded me of a snake. Sasori never flinched.

"I was wondering if I could call in a favor for my friend here, she's very concerned about people," the red head spoke very calmly and matter of factly, never breaking eye contact with his colleague. The man in front of us seemed to conciser it, analyzing Sasori and myself.

"If you'll fallow me," he spoke, voice just as calm and quiet. Sasori lead the way, pulling me along by the wrist through the house. We ventured down a hall way, though a large kitchen, a moderate sized dinning room with an expansive dinning table to a room at the back of the house containing an executive desk. Books littered every surface and pens were spewn about, large black filing cabinets framed the desk, some drawers open to reveal Manila file folders. Orochimaru took a seat at the desk, motioning for Sasori and I to sit in matching green velvet chairs in the center of the room facing the desk. I noticed a university degree hanging on the wall near hm this man had graduated from our state university with honors it appeared, and as far as I could make out, he was a psychiatrist. Before I could so much as sit down or focus, he started asking questions.

"Your well aware I cannot just dispense medication to you, are you not? I'm neither a pharmacy nor am I crooked man," the older man spoke, folding his hands into his lap. I watched Sasori pick up a pen and throw it into the other mans lap, seemingly uncaring about the manners he'd ignored to make that action.

"I'll add her to my insurance plan for the store," Sasori sighed boredly, crossing one leg across the other and examining his nails, as if he couldn't be bothered, "besides, I know you've got more drugs in this house than the factory."

That crack made me think Orochimaru had lied when he said he wasn't crooked earlier. I wasn't entirely sure if what was happening here was legal, but neither seemed bothered by my presence, someone who could have very well ran screaming from the house and called the police. My nerves had not calmed any, my fingers still twitching. I felt very small in this room, in this house, I felt more helpless than I usually did.

The snake narrowed his eyes, the two caught in silent turmoil until Orochimaru gave in and pulled out a pad of paper from the desk drawer.

"What seems to be the problem?"

Sasori looked at me this time, and I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. I shook my head and pulled my hands to wrap gently around my lower body, sort of like a hug in hopes of calming myself.

"Spit it out," the black haired man hissed.

"I, I, I uh," I stuttered.

"She's very nervous in public. She has a hard time sitting still and talking," Sasori finished. I could tell his friend wasn't happy about him answering for me, but he wrote it down anyway and then asked how long my problem had been persisting.

"Years," I managed. I felt my lips begin to tremble and the ache in my side return.

"Anything else?" He asked, writing what I'd just told him. He then preceded to pull a smaller note pad from the drawer.

"Anxiety attacks," I muttered, and he nodded. He wrote something on the smaller pad and then tore it off. What he did next I couldn't believe. He pulled out another drawer lined with pill bottles of various shapes and sizes until he pulled one out and opened it. He shook out a hand full of white pills and then put them in a smaller bottle.

"There's chemicals in the brain called neurotransmitters, and one in particular, called gaba, is a natural anxiety fighter, however, your brain releases it all the time, so it doesn't do any good for you, causing what I believe to be social anxiety. These should help," Orochimaru explained, " Sasori, these are only to hold her over until the paperwork goes though," the older man instructed, "you'll take a pill in the morning and then another half if you need it."

"What's this going to do to me?" I thought to ask as Sasori stood up and took both the pills and the prescription from his friend.

"You'll find yourself much calmer," the black haired man replied, holding out one of the white pills for me to take. I scrutinized the possibilities thousands of combinations of germs that might be on his hands but took it anyway, swallowing it dry.

"You'll stay for tea won't you?" Orochimaru asked, and Sasori agreed, pocketing my medicine and fallowed his friend to the kitchen to prepare the tea. I sat back in the chair, waiting and wishing I was drinking. I didn't feel it when the medicine first took a hold of me, but the longer they were gone the more relaxed I felt. I sank deeper into my seat, feeling as if the knots in my stomach, the snakes in my chest, and fog from my mind has finally been expelled. Why hadn't I done this years ago? My fingers curled back into my palms, able to rest now. My heart wasn't pounding and the ache in my side was all but gone. When the men returned with the tea I was completely calm.

It was a cool summer right, the crickets singing loud enough to be heard though the large windows in the room. I enjoyed my warm drink in silence, listening to old friends talk. Apparently they'd been friends in college. We were longer here then at the restaurant, and wed left fairly late. Orochimaru insisted we stay longer but the three of us still had work tomorrow, so he settled for Sasori dropping by again another time. He walked us out, and after the door closed I could vaguely hear him telling his kids not to fight and to go to bed.

"I can't thank you enough, I swear, this is the best I've ever felt," I told him after he got on the highway,

"I'm glad I could be of help," Sasori replied very plainly. I think as much as he tried to make himself look like a big bad business man, he was really just a nice guy. I mean why else would he have done this for me, why else would he keep Deidara around and employ his family when he could have easily hired better help. We arrived home without any other events.

We sat still for a while, even after the engine was off and the tires lay at rest on the cement of the driveway.

"I suppose we've finished tonight's venture," I turned to look at him, unbuckling my seat belt as he spoke.

"I'll see you again?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. He was going to kiss me again, or rather he was waiting for me to kiss him. The way his pretty brown eyes watched me, the way he sort of leaned my way, like he wanted something, but was too afraid to ask. Of course he'd act like he couldn't, but then take control.

"You'll see me again every day so long as we both live here," he responded, growing a little impatient.

"You know what I mean," I huffed and he did the same.

"Of course. You'll see me again, now, I don't like to be kept waiting," he took my chin in his hand and pulled me close, our lips meshing together in a soft kiss that reminded me of touching rose petals. This kiss was gentle and passionate and it held meaning. It was short, sweet, and just enough to leave us wanting more. However he did not indulge the desire. He only sighed, got out of the car and walked up to the house.

Hold on just a second, what the fuck just happened?

Of course I couldn't feel much, the medicine had limited my emotional range, but I was able to feel so angry I tore out of my seat and fallowed him inside. I threw the door open only to see he'd disappeared and three of the boarders starring at me like Id lopped my head off.

"You okay squirt?" Kisame asked, looking away from the football game on TV for just a second, only to jerk his head back as a whistle blew.

"Fine," I muttered, kicking my shoes off and plopping down on the couch. I folded my arms, brooding and twisting these actions in my head.

"Don't look fine," he muttered, handing me a bucket of left over fried chicken, his eyes never leaving the screen this time. I didn't answer him and I didn't stick my hand into the bucket, unsure who all had had there filthy hands in it. Itachi sat opposite me, watching the game boredly and Sasuke sat on the floor, legs folded up, engrossed in his phone. Come to think of it, this was the first time Id seen them out of there rooms besides for dinner.

"Where is everybody?" I asked, looking around after thinking about the wreckage Id see this morning. For whatever reason it was clean now.

"Kakuzu took Hidan to the hospital, Mirai's mother is getting out I guess, so he's gonna stay with her a while, Deidara is next door, I think that's everybody," he explained before throwing up his hands angrily at the game, "oh come on!"

"Sasori came in before you squirt, did you go somewhere with him?" Kisame asked, taking a sip of his drink only to slam it back down on the table after another unsatisfactory call.

"I don't want to talk about it," I responded, kicking back on the couch after setting the chicken down.

"I wouldn't worry about it," Itachi spoke, much to my surprise, "Nothing he does concerns anyone else."

I looked at him quizzically, confused. Hadn't Sasori said the same thing about him?

"Not to say Sasori is not a good man, he does a lot for a lot of people, however," Itachi sighed.

"He's an asshole," Sasuke interjected, earning a dirty look from his brother.

"No, that's not what I mean," Itachi paused, however he did not pick his sentence back up. That was it, he was an asshole. An hour ago I wouldnt have believed him.

"I'm going into work tomorrow early, wanna go?" Kisame asked, elbowing me. I thought for a second before nodding. That'd be a nice change, actually. No red headed jerks with superiority complexes, no stupid blondes that coerced me into things I didn't want to do with help from his black haired friend with bad ideas.

"Yeah, that'd be nice."


	7. Chapter 7

The famous hotel Itachi managed and Kisame dedicated himself to was truly beautiful. Six stories, a tennis court and conference rooms spread out over a wood lot with trails made up the hotel, certainly not a cheep place to stay I surmised.

Apparently Saturday was fairly busy, and someone had called in sick at the pool, leaving the job to none other than Kisame. It didn't bother him any, he loved the chlorinated water just as much as he loved junk food, coffee and football.

The ceiling of the natatorium was glass, and I couldn't help but notice the sky this morning, pale blue and clear. Without the pills Id acquired last night, I might have been more worried about the glass panes falling and killing me.

Kisame swam laps before his shift started and I wadded my feet in the shallow end, letting the tiny waves he caused in the surface wash over my sun tan lines on my ankles. As beautiful as this place was, I couldn't keep my mind off of Sasori. Why, after such a nice night, had he just gotten up and left me without so much as a good bye? Almost like he'd run away after he kissed me, acting like it hasn't meant anything to either of us only moments before.

"Hey, Kimi, are you earth bound?" Kisame said, louder than usual to get my attention. He towered over me, a towel around his shoulders and hair dripping wet.

"I'm fine," I replied, scooting back so I could use him to block the morning sun from my view.

"Your still thinking about Sasori," he laughed, sitting down next to me. Kisame was in his late thirties, almost old enough to be my dad, and he knew things I didn't about the world. He knew how to fix a car, cook a meal and he certainly knew when someone was lying. I shrugged, having been caught.

"Remember what Itachi said? Never mind him," Kisame spoke softly, folding his hands in his lap as he stared down at the water.

"I can't just never mind him, it's complicated," I replied, looking in to the water too as if he could see something I couldn't.

"Sometimes you have to take into account the kind of person someone else is and what kind of person you are, you have to know yourself and the other person," Kisame instructed, hauling himself up and finished up drying himself off as a family came down to use the pool, "I gotta work squirt."

I watched him climb up the life guard tower thing while deep in thought. What he'd said didn't make a lot of sense to me in that moment. I already knew I had to get to know Sasori better, but what did Kisame mean by taking into account the kind of person I was? Why did that matter? Didn't I already know myself?

I got up too and decided to go sit in the lobby for a while, watching Itachi work the front desk out of the corner of my eye as I pretended to watch whatever was on the television. I understood now why he was so tired and busy at home, a hundred people came though here an hour it seemed, complaining and needing something or other right that second. Itachi could always rectify the problem, but watching his smilie fall though out the day, I could see the stress this job brought on.

Kisame was done at four, having taken the early shift and we left together. I still hadn't given up thinking about what he'd said. What did I want from Sasori? I tried to tell myself it was nothing, or that I just wanted him as a friend, but I couldn't lie to myself about him like I lied about alcohol. I liked him, a lot.

He didn't feel the same about me.

After thanking Kisame I drug myself around the house and tried to do some cleaning, which ended up being not a lot. I called dinner in for later and left a note for Kakuzu, and then I went up to my room. I'd brought home half a bottle of vodka from Tobi's the other night and proceeded to pour myself a drink laying on my bed in my empty room. I wasn't sure how long Id been laying there before Deidara let himself in.

"I heard your upset," he muttered, coming to sit on the edge of the bed. I narrowed my eyes at him, sitting up and swallowing what was left my my drink.

"This is all your fucking fault, you and Tobi, without you two, I would have been happy drinking, alone, by myself," I slurred, "without you two, I wouldnt be so god damn confused or sad, or, or, whatever."

"Kimi, it's okay, Tobi said it'll work out, I," he tried to reason, but I'd had enough.

"No! Tobi is a manipulator and a psycho! Your wasting your time! Get away from me!" I shouted, picking up the bottle Id been drinking out of to dump it on him. He jumped away and retreated from the room, leaving me in peace for just a second. I'd wanted to cry, scream, loose what little control I had left when Sasori appeared in my door way.

"Go away," I commanded, but he didn't budge.

"Your angry with me and this is not the way I would like to confront the problem," he said in a tone I couldn't decipher in my drunken state. I felt sick, his presence alone made me sick.

"I'm just lonely," I tried to reason, "I let myself, I let myself fall into this, I'm a fucking idiot and your a jerk."

Sasori folded his arms and stayed quiet. His perfect eyes, his perfect face, that look he gave me, why did it have to be him? Him of all people standing I front of me?

"I'm sorry," he said and then he walked away, closing and locking the door behind him so no one else could bother me. What was he sorry for? The first or the last time he'd kissed me? For pretending to tolerate me? I couldn't stand this any more, I tore out of bed, abandoning the bottle, and fallowed him down the steps, he was headed down the stairs to the living room when I stopped him.

"Hold on, just, hold on. Just what are you doing? What are you doing to me?" I felt helpless, I felt week, and I found myself using the wall as support as I waited for my answer.

"I'm not doing anything. You just told me that It's you doing this to yourself," he replied cooly, like this entire ordeal had no effect on him.

"That's not what I mean, I..." But all of my words had left me. I couldn't think any more, just stare, hopelessly at him, waiting for him to say something. He didn't speak though, just came closer, and at first I tried to back away until I decided that I wanted to give in. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me in a loose hug, I wanted him to sigh, take my hand and take me back up to my room, I wanted him to persuade me to lie down and that was exactly what he did. I shouldnt have gave in, and I should have allowed him near me because I knew it was going to end badly.

As he turned to leave I caught his sleeve and asked him not to go. He didn't even have to think about it. He climbed into my bed, pressing my back against his chest. He wrapped an arm around me to hold my hand.

"You like me?" I asked, slurring drunkenly. With my intoxicated brain spinning, I felt like I had to.

"I do," He replied simply without hesitation.

"You want to keep seeing me?"

"I do," he replied again.

"When did you decide? And why?" I felt like I had to ask that too. Why did he keep bothering to help me when I felt like a lost cause? I felt him shake his head, refusing to respond. His hand left mine for just a moment to pull his phone out of his pocket and turn on some music. He laced our fingers as a smooth, harmonic tones drifted from the speaker, filling the room with a melodic instrumental of a popular pop song, done in an orchestra forum. So he did like things other than the news.

Neither of us spoke or moved, letting the music wash over us as song after song shuffled from sad Indy songs, to more instrumentals, and a few songs I'd heard in movies. My eyes drifted shut and I let this moment have me. I let myself relax and I felt him do the same shortly after, sighing contently.

I wondered in an absentminded drunk sort of way if this is what being sober was supposed to feel like.

When I woke up Sunday morning I had no idea where I was or why someone else was in my bed. Judging by the silence Id woken up pretty early, and after sitting up to look out the window, I confirmed my suspicion. The sun was barely up and the house was still asleep. I looked to my left briefly and then did a double take. Sasori was asleep next to me, his red hair a mess and his features more serene than usual.

I decided I was still clothed, so I figured we hadn't done anything we would have regretted. Looking around after for any more clues that could help me figure out just what it was I did last night, I noticed an empty bottle on the floor and paled. Never in my life had I been black out drunk but apparently I had last night.

I got up after watching Sasori sleep for a while longer, deciding I needed to straighten up this room. I picked up all my bottles and dirty cloths, making a pike of trash, cloths and general things that didn't have a place. Movies, my purse I never used, a ball of twine I couldn't remember where it'd come from, and some other things equally not as important. All the while I couldn't help but think my hang over was catching up on me.

I felt a familiar ache in my stomach and head, like someone was driving a nail though me. Finally I gave up trying to make this place look presentable and lay back down, letting my shoulder length blonde hair fan out behind me. It'd gotten so long, when had my last haircut been? Shifting my gaze from the peak of the ceiling to my bed mate, I felt a little tinge of panic. What if this was all an accident or what if he did this out of pity? What were the others thinking about us right now and what were they saying? I could only imagine the rumors.

"You look stricken."

The real world demanded my attention and I found myself looking in to his pretty brown orbs yet again. His words left his lips in a murmur, half lidded eyes watching me. His chest rose and fell more noticeably and his facial features twisted into a scowl as the sun shone though my drapeless windows. He probably would have stayed asleep if it weren't for that.

"I'm fine. I'm just," I trailed off, unsure of the right words, and got up to find the pills he'd procured for me, I'd almost forgotten about them and there almost magic powers.

"You asked me last night if I wanted to continue seeing you," he spoke, projecting his voice across the room as I looked around though my things for the bottle, "I do wish to continue seeing you, however, I've got a few things I'd like to discuss."

I didn't respond.

"I'm very concerned about the maturity level of this relationship, I'm worried you won't be able to handle it," he said and I pretended to be busy, though Id just found the pills and currently held them in my hand.

"What do you mean?" I asked, sparing him a glance.

"Are you aware I am twelve years older than you?"

"Well, I knew you were older," I offered, almost in consolation. I finally popped the top on my pills and found an old bottle of water I deemed safe to drink and downed it as he continued.

"Don't you find that a bit concerning? I was hitting puberty when you were born."

I nearly choked before I swallowed, taking just a second to wiped my mouth before I shook my head. I knew he was just trying to put things in perspective for me, but that was not a way I wanted to think about things. I swallowed slowly and answered, "I don't find it concerning no, we're both adults."

"Barely," he huffed, but quickly moved on, "and you've got a nasty drinking problem."

At that time, I was aware I was developing something, but I wouldnt of exactly called it a problem. Of course, an alcoholic never realizes until it's too late.

"I can stop any time I want," I insisted, not able to turn around and face him though I had nothing to busy myself with now. He didn't reply. I was being honest with him, I really did think I could stop when ever I wanted, but I was already in too deep. Besides, the ice queen laying in my bed was not without his own flaws.

That Sunday morning was the end of my second week and the start of a relationship, a relationship Id longed for without even knowing it, but that Sunday was also the beginning of disaster. Eventually I had to leave my bedroom, and I did so leaving him in my bed.

Id spent far too many days away from home I realized when I saw the amount of requests from the tenants on the sheet in the office. Id wanted to spend a lazy day in my room, however, instead I found myself washing Hidan's laundry that's apparently been in the washer for days, preventing anyone else from using it. I didn't understand why the other tenants hadn't just taken it out and put there's in until I found it was mostly underwear.

Men were so strange, they wouldn't touch each others clean laundry but they would share chips and chicken? I didn't get it.

Next was the refrigerator, my tape had been removed so I spent some time labeling bowls and sections and setting aside left overs to eat myself later.

I realized on my way upstairs that the house was strangely empty. I didn't hear some much as a peep as I poured draino down the shower or while I did a quick hack job on washing the windows.

Looking outside, I noticed only Hidan's motor cycle in the drive way, though the bike had remained here even after its owner had gone. Where had Sasori snuck off too, again without so much as saying good bye? Where had Itachi taken Sasuke and was Kisame with them?

I figured Deidara was over to Tobi's, so I slipped on my shoes and walked across the yard where I found the back door locked. That was strange, it was usually always open. I walked around front where I noticed a car Id never seen before and after trying the front door, I got a little suspicious. I knew Tobi drove his aunts car, and his uncles black car sat next to it, so who was here in that God awful colored orange Toyota? I turned to knock only to have the door fly open and Deidara push past me, head down so I couldn't see his face. He darted across the yard, slamming the garden gate and he was gone, seconds later Tobi came dashing out of the house, but was unable to get though, Deidara having locked the gate on his side.

A short haired woman was the last to push past me, getting her keys from her pocket and climbing into the orange car. When the engine started, Tobi whipped around and jogged to the drive way, asking her to wait, but she as already backing out. Moments later she was gone.

"What just happened?" I asked, but Tobi was not able to answer me.

"Tobi?" I asked, coming closer, and it was clear he was crying, looking more defeated than I thought a person could look. His arms were slack but the rest of his body was tense. His face was beat red and tear streaked and he sniffled a little.

"Tobi what happened?" I pressed, but he only buried his face in his hands to sob. Hesitantly I raised a hand to pat his back, but it did not seem to help. I decided, even though I didn't want to, I should give him a hug, and no sooner did I wrap my arms around him did he latch on to me.

"I loved her," he choked, "and she comes back here asking me to pick and I can't! I can't just pick! I loved her so much and she wrecked me."

I couldn't make sense of his vague words, so I patted his back a little more, but he still refused to let go, the taller man's tears staining my sleeves and his hands fisted into the loose fabric of my shirt. I was extremely uncomfortable.

I recognized the sound of Kakuzu's car before I saw it, the cobalt blue Audi had a certain idle to it unique to it, so I wasn't surprised when he pulled into Tobi's drive way. After the accountant got out, so did Tobi's aunt and uncle, back from vacation. Tobi was forced to straighten up, whipping his face with his bare wrist and choking back sobs to get ahold of himself and letting go of me.

"What's the matter Obito?" The woman, Konan, asked, approaching us with her carry on bag in hand. Id never heard anyone use Tobi's real name until then.

"Nothing," he sort of groaned in a way that didn't sound like him or his fake voice. Kakuzu and Pein, baggage in hand came away from the car and up to the house, pein making a remark I hadn't heard.

"Something has gone wrong, tell me," Konan commanded, but Tobi shook his head.

"Don't be silly, come on now, this isn't the Obito that I know," she pried again, just like I had, but instead it set him off.

"I'm not being silly you fridged bitch! Jesus Christ! Must you always be on top of me? Must I have my grievances known to the public? I don't want to talk about it! The girl of my life has just... and your still going on about this pretend charade that I- "

A harsh hand meet Obito's cheek, surprising us both as the sound seemed to echo.

"Do you honestly think I don't know already about your little game? What do you take me for? A fool? I allow you in my home, I put up with your nonsense, you above all are to treat me with respect, the least you owe me is some common curtsey. My lord, don't you owe it to someone?" Konan's words cut him deeper than any weapon could have. He ran, faster than Id ever seen down the street and he disappeared. I had no intentions of going after him, but something nagged at me that I should have.

"Please, come inside, I'm sorry you had to see that," Konan's voice was gentler and softer now, though her calm expression had never wavered. I fallowed her per requested and found myself with a glass of iced tea in my hands fifteen minutes later.

"I'm impressed you've stayed as long as you have, usually Tobi or Hidan run off our help," Pein spoke, sitting around a circular outdoor table on the homes back deck. Konan sat next to him, pulling back a chair to be as close to him as she could. I still felt a little uneasy, Id only meet these people once before.

"We've only had once incident," Kakuzu grumbled, eyeing me as he seated himself at the table with us, "she got lucky with Hidan, he's been busy."

"I hope you'll be staying longer," Pein flatly, stirring his drink with his straw, "I already miss vacation."

Up until now I had only smiled and nodded, unsure and nervous despite my medicine. This was my boss, well, both of my bosses, and the last thing I wanted to do was say something wrong. The mention of 'the incident' was enough.

The four of us watched as the garden gate opened again, and I expected to see Deidara or Tobi, but instead a familiar red head waltzed though, greeting his land lords and Kakuzu.

"Id love to stay and chat," he said after pleasantries, "however Kimiko and I have some business to attend to."

I had no idea what business I had, but I was glad to leave, excusing myself and leaving with Sasori.

"Deidara isn't there, is he?" Sasori asked after we'd gotten though the gate. I shook my head.

"It seems he's stolen my car."

"_What_?" I asked, flabbergasted, "why would he do that? Let's not jump to conclusions, he's not a bad kid, really."

"It appears that way on the outside. I went to check on the shop this morning and when I returned, I went looking for something, and as I passed by the window in the den, I noticed my car was not where I parked it. I thought perhaps you were playing a not so funny joke on me, but you looked quite busy."

"He and Tobi got in a fight, is that relevant?" I asked and Sasori seemed to consider it.

"I guess so," he muttered, seemingly deep in thought. I watched his face twist from thought to dread in silence. I went over his story in my head a hundred times during the silence.

"Am I the something you were looking for earlier?" I asked, going out on a limb. Id bet money I was right.

"You've done a lovely job on the windows," he replied, and we both knew that was a lie. A smile spread onto my face but he refused to look at me.

"I'm going to report the car stolen to the authorities," he sighed, and I didn't comment. There was nothing else to do. Two hours later he'd called the police, made a statement, called the insurance company and then called his sister to ask if he could barrow his nephews car. Incidentally, Kankuro had just had his car privileges taken away. I didn't ask why but I suspected after the car had been dropped off that it had something to do with the smell inside.

Not only did it reek like cigarettes, but I found a box of condoms hidden under the empty McDonnalds bags as I cleaned out the back seat. Sasori said something about the expiration date of the condoms and I silently hoped the sixteen year old kid wasn't using them.

"Teenagers are discusting," the marionette marker remarked, cramming more junk from the passenger seat into a trash bag, "I hope my car doesn't come back like this."

"At least he's not a five year old," I tried to joke, but Sasori didn't even crack a smilie.

"Children are equally as disgusting," he replied.

"Well, right," I muttered, "that's what I meant. Anyway, what sort of stuff do you like to do besides making things?

"Why are you asking?" I should have known that was coming.

"Well, Kisame said that since we didn't know each other very well, I should, well, he didn't really say what I should do," I replied, thinking there was no sense in telling a fib or stretching the truth.

"What, you take dating advice from Kisame now?" He asked, standing straight up to look at me very seriously over the roof of the car. I could see he had his hands on his hips, which were sort of cocked to one side.

"Who was I supposed to ask? You?" I retorted.

"fair enough," he droned, narrowing his eyes at me briefly before resuming his task, "I enjoy orchestras and reading."

"What's your favorite book?" I asked, coming around the car with my half empty bag and taking his full one.

"I don't particularly have one, however, if I had to pick, " he paused a moment to think, "Farewell to arms."

"Hemingway? Really?" I was nearly laughing as I tied the bag up and pushed it aside to grab the window cleaner, "I would have pegged you more uh, I dunno, Mary Shelly."

"What? Frankenstein? Not a chance," he smirked, "I hope those windows turn out better than the house windows."

"Ha, ha," I said sarcastically, seating myself in the back, door open so I could still talk to him as I worked.

"Let me guess," he mused, "I bet you like The Gatsby? You've quoted it once."

"Once," I repeated, confirming his statement. I had quoted it, the night we spent the evening on Tobi's couch. I hadn't thought he remembered it. It was ironic, the authors of those books were friends. It felt sort of strange to be standing there, flirting with him, but strange in a good way.

"I've never read Farewell To Arms, just In Our Time," I noted, "I was the queen of required high school reading, but not much else."

"That explains a lot," he jested, "lucky for you, I was the king of required reading in high school."

"Yeah, fifty years ago," I mocked, moving to another window.

"Ha, ha," it was his turn to be sarcastic, repeating me, "moving on, what is it that you enjoy?"

"I don't know," I shrugged, what was it I did besides drink and clean? "Watch tv?"

Later that night, I heard a knock on my door while I was having a drink, and found a hard bound copy of Farewell To Arms on the first step. No note, no explanation or red headed to tell me what it was doing there. I didn't need to be told though, I knew why the book was there, and I felt that feeling again, when I was drunk and happy and felt sober, but I was not drunk and I was still happy and I was feeling this all for the first time again. I lay back on the bed, sipping my drink leisurely and cracked the book, opening to chapter one.


	8. Chapter 8

The house was unusually calm and stayed unusually clean with Tobi, Deidara and Hidan gone. While I admitted I missed them, I did not miss the extra work I did for them.

Deidara had been gone about a week with no clues, no hints, and Sasori's car assumably accompanied him. Not only did he have a warrant for auto theft, but we'd also filled out a missing persons. Sasori wouldn't keep paying his way if he wasn't here, so I was eventually informed of some boxes in the basement. If worse came to worse, Deidara would no longer be occupying his room upstairs.

Tobi had been gone the same amount of time, though I didn't ask how his aunt and uncle handled it. Hidan passed by here and there to get some things, he was slowly but surely moving out too. I surmised something had changed with that woman, either they weren't just friends anymore or she was very sick, and by the smilie on his face I assumed it was the first.

Kakuzu had taped a note to my door Tuesday morning when I woke up, asking that I organize a section of the garage for whatever reason. He didn't say why.

Id never been in the garage before, so it was an interesting time fumbling for a light switch to find the garage door opener. The place was trashed, filled with old boxes full of things from past and present tenants. Names were conveniently labeled on the boxes, lucky for me, so I hauled them out into the front lawn to sort later and retrieved more boxes from the basement to hold the leftover junk.

The back wall was to be shelving, but it was currently empty. It was my job to put to shelving up, assembling the locking, PVC plastic, five level storage racks in a little under an hour. The organization of the boxes depended on how well I liked the people, for instance tall Hidan's shit got shoved on the bottom shelf, just to inconvenience him, however Sasori's single box got a nice eye level spot. I found hooks and hung up tools after clearing off a work bench, washed the windows and then thought to look at the floor. Apparently they'd worked on cars here before, because there was an old oil spill that'd never been cleaned up and dry antifreeze along with other mystery liquids staining the floor. Id get to them after lunch, Id earned it after working all morning.

I washed my hands repeatedly in the kitchen sink before I went to the fridge to find one thing to munch on, deciding on cold pizza and some half flat pop, but after Id sat down at the kitchen table with it, I realized I wasn't hungry. I watched out the kitchen window over the sink, waiting for Deidara to walk though that back gate, laughing with Tobi the whole time, problem solved but he never did.

I wondered if Deidara had shown up for work today, though he hadn't the last week, so I had no reason to think he would but I had hope, so I decided to call Sasori at work, fully aware he wouldn't be able to talk long. His nephew answered the phone but quickly handed it over to his uncle.

"Hello?" He asked in a way that made me think he knew it was me.

"Hi," I greeted, a smile creeping up onto my face.

"Hello there," he sounded like he was smiling too.

"I was just wondering if Deidara showed up today?" The line was quiet a moment before he answered me.

"Not today," he sighed, "your really worried about him hm?"

"I am," I replied, licking my suddenly dry lips, "but whatever, I mean I'm sure he's fine. How are you doing?"

"Fine, today's been unusually slow, I've mostly been working in the back," he returned, meaning he'd been working on the marionettes. I imagined him with that cute look he got on his face when he was frustrated, rasp in hand and sawdust in his hair. I didn't reply to him, using that image to get my missing 'younger brother' off my mind.

"I've got to go now, Gaara dropped something. I'll see you at home, good bye," Sasori replied and I hung up. I sat back in the chair a while longer. Id need kitty litter to clean up the oil and it wasn't like I could work around it, so I decided to just stay put since we didn't have a cat or litter.

It was such a lovely summer day, I should be out enjoying it. The grass in the yard was short, Id cut it yesterday, so I thought maybe Id lay down and cloud watch for a while.

Id just gotten up to take care of my plate when I heard a knock at the door. I litterally dropped what I was doing to answer it, only to find Sasuke's girlfriend on our front porch and not Deidara. I gave her a fake smilie and welcomed her, her boyfriend flying down the steps minutes later. They kissed and hugged, not something I much cared to see right now with my own love life up in the air, so I turned around to walk away when the red headed girlfriend caught my arm.

"Wait a second, I remember you. You came to see my foster dad, I'm suppose to ask how you were doing."

"Fine," I smiled, "just fine, the medicine helped a lot."

"Are you sure? You didn't look so happy when you opened the door," she offered. Oh come on, I groaned mentally.

"Yes, I'm fine, I'm just worried is all."

"Are you guys still looking for Deidara?" Sasuke asked and I nodded. He wouldn't have known since he steered clear of pretty much everyone. "I know where he is."

My eyes widened and I gave him a look like he was stupid, "where?"

"He's parked at the campground. We saw him the other day when we uh," he trailed off. I'm sure whatever they were doing I would not approve of, and it was best he shut up.

"Don't you think it would have been good to tell me that days ago?" I asked, he shrugged. Of course not. I waved them off as I walked back to the kitchen and I heard the door shut as they left. I was on the phone again moments later, but this time no one answered. I tried another three times before I gave up, didn't he know this was urgent?

I started to panic again despite my medicine, and forced myself to take another half of a pill, and after that I sort of felt dead. I was unable to get off the couch but I was also unable to think about anything. I supposed that was a good thing, it was the entire point of the meds.i passed in and out of sleep for hours until the tenants started in the door.

Kisame shook my shoulder, pulling me out of my drug induced slumber. My eyes focused in and out until they settled on his face, which was fine except there were two of him. He snapped his fingers a few times in front of my face but it didn't do anything to help.

"Kimi, wake up," I heard him say, and at first he sounded like he was talking though a tube.

"I'm awake," I mumbled, "not used to the, uh, the medicine."

"Hey, Sasori, I got her up," Kisame said, his voice clearer, he walked away and Sasori took his place.

"You cannot keep calling me at work, what is it you wanted?" he spat, but I was in no mood.

"For your information," I huffed, "I found Deidara."

His features changed from hard and angry to interested, eyebrows raised. "Oh."

"I guess he's at the campground, where ever that is." I scowled, not feeling so well at the moment. Had I fallen asleep sitting up?

"I'll go and get him," Sasori said, my vision becoming clearer too. I shook my head and stood up on unsteady legs.

"No, your just gonna yell at him and make it worse," I explained, but that served only to annoy him.

"He is not my son, he is not your son either. We are not concerned with making it worse, I am not concerned with his comfort, I've told him before I am finished with his foolishness, It's not up to you or I to raise him."

"Oh my god," I groaned, "he's a run away, nothing means anything to him!"

He looked taken back. How could that be when he'd known the blonde longer than I had? He was so set in his ways, so resistant and cold, of course I understood better. I felt close to Deidara, closer than I had to any friend Id ever had, and I knew letting Sasori yell at him like he had the other night was not the answer. I didn't particularly have any skills talking with people, in fact I usually tried to avoid it, but with no other choice I had to step up.

"What is this really about?" The red head asked.

"You, I guess, I dunno," I replied, not totally aware of what I was saying or how it sounded.

"Fine, lets go. You talk him out of it if you know so much," he spat and I reached out for his hand to steady myself. I needed his help to get to the car and once I was in, I began planning what I was going to say. I should tell him I loved him, like a brother anyway, and I should tell him that everything was going to be fine, that everything would work out. But then I thought to tell Sasori something before he found out on his own.

"Sasori," I murmured, "you know he's dating your niece right?"

"Nonsense, Temari's boyfriend picks her up every day from the store," Sasori answered. That didn't make sense.

"What?" I asked, "he told me that..." I trailed off, wait, what had he told me? He'd never said he and Temari dated, Id said that hadn't I?

"Deidara is gay, did you not know that?" He replied, sparring me a glance as he turned a corner. My mouth fell open. Jesus, had I been that dense not to see it before? Everything made sense now, the argument, the huge ass hickey, his unwavering tolerance for the older man.

"Oh my god," I muttered. I felt like an idiot.

"What did you mean earlier when you said this was about me?" He asked, driving out of the suburbs and into the country side.

"I dunno," I muttered, "sometimes I just think that you think uh... That you get so caught up thinking you know that you miss stuff. You were afraid I was going to be too immature for you, do you still think I'm immature?"

"Not as much as I used to," he smirked, I returned it sort of coy.

We arrived at the campground, I discovered it was little more than a clearing on the side of the land locked lake. The famed beach was on the other side. Sasori told me teenagers came to this spot to hang out often, but he never imagined that Deidara would come here. Sure enough he'd parked Sasori's car on the tree line, and he sat backwards on the hood facing the lake. I got out, leaving Sasori in the car and approached him, his blonde hair catching the wind. The air smelled like lake water and pine and the view here was killer. He must have heard me as my feet crunched the loose rock that covered the ground and turned to look at me.

"Hey," I greated lamely, pressing my lips into a thin line.

"Hey," he murmured, turning back to the lake and hoping Id go away.

"You look like one of your paintings sitting out here all alone," I remarked, looking out over the water too.

"Sure," he agreed, his tone lifeless and sad. He'd been sitting on all these emotions for a week and I figured he was about ready to explode.

"What was it about?" I asked, referencing the fight and seating myself on the car hood too.

"I dunno. His old girlfriend came around and he, I dunno, he's still in love with her."

"But isn't he with you?" I asked, and his head snapped in my direction, his visible eye widening in fear. I jutted my thumb in the direction Id just came and he put his head in his hands.

"You don't know what it's like. Tobi can't tell his aunt and uncle, he can't tell his parents, it's like he's ashamed! He has to hide me! He's better off with that girl," he whipped his eyes a few times and sniffled, face reddening as a few tears streaked down his face, "he choose her over me before."

"Anybody who can't love you for who you are isn't worth being around. If he has to act like that then he's not worth your time. It sounds like he's not worth your time anyway," I told him, ignoring my own comfort for his and wrapped him in a tight hug. His arms tangled around me and he clung to my chest. I pressed his head into my shoulder as he started to cry and held him there. I suspected he'd never had anyone like me to be there for him before. He didn't have to hide himself to me anymore.

"Come home, please. It's so empty without you there," I tried to soothe him. He only hugged me tighter. We sat there a while longer, watching the sun go down over gently lapping waves. He expressed to me he wanted to go home, badly, and we left. He wanted to ride alone with Sasori and I let him, thinking letting him have a man to man talk would be good.

When we arrived home I went to the couch to lay down and have a drink while Sasori called the police about his no longer stolen car and Deidara found his way to the kitchen to eat something decent for the first time in a week. I nodded off for a while, probably about an hour and a half of dreamless sleep before my not so boyfriend let himself into the room.

I felt him take the cup of vodka from my hand and set it on the coffee table and that was enough to wake me up.

"Kakuzu will have a fit if you stain the sofa," he smirked, seating himself beside me. I hadn't drank enough to even give me a buzz, but I felt funny because of the way the alcohol and medicine mixed. I supposed he just wanted to spend some time together, so I shifted myself to lean on his shoulder.

"Your ball of sunshine is in bed, I suppose everything is right in the world," I heard him say. God he was so warm.

"Good," I replied, snuggling into him a little further. His land lay in his lap and I took it, running my thumb over his fingers gently. Not only was he warm, but he smelled nice, like pine from the shop and a little cologne. His hands were always soft, which I found surprising for as much as he did with them.

I started daydreaming, thinking how nice this felt and how nice it would feel to do this forever. I was in love with this man, all by accident. A boy not much older than myself had taken it upon himself to play Cupid and as much as I resisted it, I liked it. I liked him, and I felt confident now he felt the same way about me. We sat in silence, watching the muted TV before he got up, without even saying a word and started to leave the room.

"Wait, wait, where are you going?" I asked, forced to sit up now Id nearly fallen over.

"Bed," he answered very plainly.

"Your not even going to say goodbye?" I asked, confused. He shook his head.

"I've got to go, I'm sorry," he replied, and hurriedly left the room. Hold on just a damn second!

I downed my drink, taking the bottle and myself upstairs. I knocked on his door, knowing something was wrong, but he didn't answer. I saw the light on under the door but I was afraid to knock again in case Kakuzu came out of his room and raised holy hell. I felt bad, but it was clear he felt worse. Something was wrong, there was some reason he reacted this way, something happened in his head every time we got close. He had a reason he ran away, he wasn't just cold.

I was starting to feel funny again, and my brain was screaming at me to go lay down, to go to sleep, but I couldn't do that, not with him hurting. I tried the door knob, and after finding it unlocked I turned it, and pushed open the door.

Sasori was sitting on the edge of his head, a hand on either side of his head, fingers fisted in his hair. He was sort of slumped over, elbows resting on his thighs and I thought he might be shaking.

"Sasori," I murmured, stepping into the room and closing the door behind me.

"Go away, please go away, I'm not in the mood," he growled, flashing me a dangerous look. Something held Sasori back from being close to me, from being close to Deidara. I couldn't judge on his relationship with everyone, but in my experience he treated everyone the same, constantly keeping them at a distance, but it was me he pushed away. This entire ordeal tonight was about me, it was about us.

"I don't really care," I replied as I came closer and touched my hand to his shoulder, he reached across his chest to hold it.

"I can't handle this tonight, please go away," he sighed, pushing my hand away.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I offered again but he shook his head.

"No, thank you," he answered, raking his hand though his hair, "it'd be better if you just left."

I wanted to tell him how I felt so he would know that no matter what happened I wanted to be at his side. I was a god damn coward, standing there with my mouth open but no words coming out. Tell him now or never. I swallowed hard and tried again, but the words that came out where not the ones Id hoped.

"I don't want to."

He looked up, moving smoothly and gracefully to sit up straight and make eye contact with me, his face twisted in an expression that begged the question, just what the hell was I trying to say? I cleared my throat and got a grip.

"I don't want to leave, I want to stay with you. Sasori I," I murmured. I watched his eyes widen and he sort of leaned away from me, as if the words coming next were reaching for him and he wanted to stay just out of their grasp.

"I love you."

He stared at me for a long time and I stared back. His russet colored irises looked empty and his jaw was slack. He looked sort of like his brain had crashed and I watched slowly as it restarted.

"You don't love me, you love the idea of me," he growled. His words stung.

"Don't twist my words. I do love you. I know because I have never felt this way about another person," I answered. I didn't expect him to understand how anxiety worked. I felt like people judged me no matter what I did, I felt like making connections with people did more harm than good. I felt alone and claustrophobic in a room full of people, it was a miracle I was able to make friends when so many others with my same condition couldn't even forum a coherent conversation.

"You aren't sober. I watched you drink tonight, your lying," he accused, but I shook my head.

"Im not sober, but I'm not drunk either," I replied. He reached for the bottle in my hand took a swig after I let him have it. There hasn't been much in it to begin with, if he drank the rest he might end up with a buzz, but he didn't appear to want anymore of the bitter tasting liquid. He only watched it as he sloshed it around the bottom of the bottle.

"Why? Why are you still bothering if Tobi isn't here anymore?" He asked, clearing the bottle and tossing the empty remains across the room.

"Because Tobi doesn't matter. It's not about what he wants anymore," I told him. He looked at me with distain, narrowing his eyes and scowling. I watched as he relaxed, the lazy expression returning to his features.

"You can leave now," he droned, "you've paid back your debt to me. That's all you were after right? So you don't feel guilty?"

"No, that's not why I'm here . I already told you," I said very plainly, "what is it you want me to say? What words do I have to use to make you understand?"

"I don't want to hear anything. I especially don't want to hear you tell me that you love me. It's disgusting!" The red head laughed, a strange smilie ghosting over his lips.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" I shouted, "what is it, that, that, you always do this! We can have a nice night and then you self destruct! I want to help you!"

"Fuck off!" He shouted back, "as if you could understand!"

"I could try," I glowered, struggling to stay calm. My head was spinning faster and faster and I knew I couldn't keep this up much longer.

"You can't understand. You and I are different people. Everyone that has ever meant anything to me has..." He trailed off, "never mind. Just, nevermind. We'll talk more in the morning."

I could settle for that I decided and turned to leave.

"Where are you going?" He asked, sliding himself all the way onto the bed. He stayed to the left, implying he'd left the right side for me, "get the lights will you?"

I smiled and did as he asked, deciding that we weren't that different after all. He too sought comfort in companionship. I hit the mattress and promptly passed out.

The next morning the fuzzy feeling was gone, but Sasori had stayed. As I gained awareness of my surroundings, I could still feel him, warm as ever laying next to me. I blinked the sleep out of my eyes and slowly sat up so as not to wake him. The clock on the wall read eleven thirty five, meaning we'd both slept in.

"Sasori, your late for work," I said, shaking him awake. His eyes opened and his bronze colored orbs came to rest on me.

"Your late!" I repeated, but he only sat up, shook his head and yawned.

"I'm not late. I'm doing some errands today, Deidara went along ahead of me to the store," he answered, scratching his head. He'd sleep on his side, so his bed head was matted down the right. I sighed, quite relieved that I hadn't caused any problems by staying over. He'd never say it to my face but he was glad I had slept over. He was glad Id stuck by him.

"Kimi," he mumbled, "let's not bring last night up again alright?"

"Okay," I smiled, "you can tell me when your ready."

He rolled his eyes, he didn't want to tell me about it at all. He was on his feet after, going to the closet to find cloths for the day.

"Kimi, you've got to get dressed and get ready too. I simply cannot take my new girlfriend out to lunch in her pajamas," he said, draping his pants and a belt over his left arm. My face lit up.

"Hurry up," he urged, "we've already wasted half of the day."

Reluctantly I got up, having been reminded that Sasori was still Sasori, no matter my connection with him.


	9. Chapter 9

Thursday meant a new month and a new month meant I got paid. Three hundred dollars added to what I already had gave me enough to buy a new bed set, some curtains, a table, and a case of wine. I usually drank vodka, but after everything that's happened, I thought a switch was in order. The clear, bitter liquid might have been bad luck or something, and jesus changed water into wine, so I thought I was better off.

That morning was fifty shades of fine when I got up, straightened the house up and began on a new meal plan. Pizza and Chinese was beginning to get old, so I decided on ordering from a restaurant, maybe like salad and a daily special to keep the cost down. It'd probably be healthier that way too, by a little anyway, so I put the plan on the refrigerator and stuck it to a magnetic clip.

A dark object in the back yard caught my eye as I passed though the kitchen, a very familiar black object.

"Tobi!" I exclaimed, throwing open the back door. He twisted around and gave me a small smile, waving a little like hadn't been missing for ten days.

"Tobi, Jesus Christ! Disappear much?" I asked, kneeling to his level to get a look at him. He'd showered recently and these were not the cloths of seen him last in, so he'd gone somewhere and taken care of himself.

"I'm fine," he replied, seeing the deeper meaning to my question, "I'm back now I guess."

"Yeah, no kidding," I muttered, standing back up, "Do your aunt and uncle know your here?"

"Yeah they do, I'm back home. Actually, can you do something for me? Don't tell anyone I was here, I just came to see how Deidara was," he spoke, very clearly and very softly, like this was all some elaborate secret when he knew I was the only one home.

"He's fine, he's been gone too, but he's fine now. You gonna talk in circles all day or tell me what happened?" I asked, feeling a little déjà-vu. I'd done this same thing to Hidan a few weeks ago.

"Well, uh, Dei and I were watching a movie when my ex-girlfriend drops by. Rin is all gun ho im gonna take her back after she dumps me, but I guess I just jumped in with," he paused, unsure if he should say anything, but I informed him that I already knew about him and Deidara.

"So she's pissed but I still love her," he continued, "she goes to leave and I go with her, and I kiss her, Deidara gets up and starts yelling, Rin didn't know that uh, my door swung both ways and it was a mess."

I nodded and tried to console him after. I told him it could only get better from here, but he shook his head.

"After I found Rin I went to see my parents and I told them everything. They're mad. Beyond mad. Rin is mad too, so are my aunt and uncle."

"Well still. Id say that's pretty rock bottom. It's really hard to pick yourself up off the ground, but deep down you know what you gotta do," I told him, folding my hands in my lap. He'd have to do the work too, and grow up a lot too on the way. I was about to go back inside when I thought to tell him something else.

"Hey, Tobi, you were right about me and Sasori."

I could see him grin as I turned around and left, closing the back door behind me. I loaded the dish washer and in the small time it took to do that, he'd disappeared again. I settled down on the couch to watch an afternoon talk show Id taken a liking too and waited for the rest of the tenants to get home.

TV time was always my filler. I didn't particularly want to relax but I didn't have anything that needed to be done. It was a boring time and I found myself wishing more and more that someone other than Sasuke (who wanted nothing to do with me) would be here more often to talk to.

The afternoon passed slowly, agonizingly slowly. The first few tenants were late to come home, so everyone ended up in a cluster fuck in the driveway. I tried to stay out of it, but I found myself snickering from my view out the window as Kakuzu and Itachi tried to figure out who had to park in the street today since Sasori had stolen one of the driveway spots. Deidara flew in first fallowed by Kisame and then Sasori. The blonde ran upstairs and then back down with his black bag, stepping in front of the TV to get my attention.

"Kimi, Sasori has a project for me, I want you to come help," he insisted, nearly yanking me off of the sofa. I was glad to help after so long alone, but I was even more excited for him to let go of my hand. He lead me outside and we hauled two large plywood boards from Sasori's back seat to the back yard. Apparently Sasori had given him these to create a display for the store front. The blonde wanted to do a beach on one and a cool logo on the other made with hands.

"You've got tiny girl hands, like little kid hands, so I though you'd do good on that," he laughed, "I'll draw it out for you to start on."

"I do not have little kid hands! I'm bigger than you!" I argued, grumbling as he started spraying white paint.

"Yeah, taller by maybe a half an inch," he sneered, elbowing me and grabbing a can of light blue paint. I heard the back door open and close and looking behind me, Sasori approached with a glass of iced tea, stopping short of us to loom over Deidara as he worked.

"What are you planning, might I ask?" My boyfriend asked, almost mocking.

"Uh, a beach and a cool hand print sun, it's gonna be cool, just you wait," Deidara stood up with the orange and yellow paint cans, shaking them vigorously before he pulled out his bandana and pulled it over his nose. I stood up and took a few steps back to avoid the paint that didn't make it onto the wood. Sasori offered me a drink of his tea which i declined.

"You'll kiss me but you won't drink after me?" He ask, rolling his eyes. He had a point, after Id stuck my tongue in his mouth. He produced a bottle of yellow paint from his pocket and handed it to me, saying Deidara had asked for it.

"Do you paint too Sasori?" I asked, thumbing over the bottle. This was apparently not cheep paint.

"Sometimes," he muttered, and asked again if I wanted some of his drink. I maintained my answer as Deidara finished, having made a circle in the center reminiscent of tie-dye.

"Just wait until you see it Sasori!" Deidara boasted, puffing out his chest. He stood up, took the paint from me and squirted it all over my hands. He instructed me to rub them together and stick them to the plywood around the circle. At first it just looked like my hands, messy, but after repeating the action a few times, it really did start looking like a sun.

"This is actually really cute," I remarked, looking up to see Sasori had gone. I frowned, and asked where he had gone, but Deidara only shrugged. After I finished I thanked my pretend little brother and headed inside out of the summer sun, washed my hands up to the elbow and then when looking for Sasori. I found him in his bedroom, sitting at his desk, writing something in a moleskin note book. I knocked before I opened the door, but stayed in the door way.

"You up and left again," I pointed out, he didn't look up.

"Deidara asked to burn those after I finish with them. He said they were too permanent. I did this to give him an outlit, not to encourage him to destroy things," he replied, avoiding my unasked question. This actually had nothing to do with anything, he wasn't upset or mad, he just wanted to change the subject.

"You know how he is. Tell him no and send him to me if he throws a fit," I offered, the red head huffed. It was quiet for a while before he finally looked up, turned around and starred at me.

"I'm assuming you want to spend time together?" He asked, throwing me off guard. Well of course I did, but why point it out like that? I nodded away, deciding it was better not to ask.

"Come inside then, and shut the door," he almost commanded, and I did like he asked. He knew me well enough to know my anxiety was not completely gone, and gave me permission to sit on his bed, otherwise I would have just stood there awkwardly.

"I was going to ask you something, but I'm not sure if I want to, or if it's appropriate," he stated, turning his office chair around to face me. He folded his fingers and put his lap, looking quite serious now. I shifted and looked away from him for just a second.

"You can ask me, it's okay," I returned, soft of afraid of what he might ask with that look on his face. He sighed, looked down at his hands and then sighed again, making me wonder what was such a big deal.

"My family has decided to have a dinner to celebrate my grandmother coming back into town. Id like to bring you along, but I'm afraid of what might happen," he explained, "I don't want to take you somewhere you'll be uncomfortable."

Jesus! He wanted me to meet his family already? We'd only been dating a short time, this was a big deal! I didn't want him to think he was moving too fast or that I didn't want to meet them, usually something like this meant a relationship was getting serious.

"Yes," I smiled, "Id like to go if you'll let me."

"It's not just you I'm worried about. My family is not exactly the friendliest bunch, my sister is just about the only tolerable one," he drawled, like he had already lost what little patience he had with them.

"You'll be there, right? It'll be fine," I tried to assure him. He sighed once more and looked over his shoulder out the window.

"If your sure. It's in three days," he replied, looking back at me with a softer expression, "would you like to see what I'm working on?"

I nodded, and he got up, bringing the notebook with him. I took the book as he sat down and examined the pencil drawing on the page. He'd been drawing in charcoal pencil, sketching and shading anatomy poses. My smile widened. They were beautiful and I told him so. He thanked me as I looked back over the page, noticing that a figure on the far left had a very familiar facial structure.

"Tobi is back in town," I told him, and he sort of rolled his eyes.

"I heard. Do me a favor and tell Deidara to stay away from him," Sasori replied. I should have known with the way rumors spread in this house. He lay back on the bed and I fallowed his lead, looking up at the starch white ceiling. The line of peculiar conversation continued.

"Where do you see yourself in ten years?" He asked, his fingers creeping over to lay his hand gently across mine.

"Well, I want to go to college, I wanna get a better job, um," I trailed off, "what about you?"

"Thinking about retirement," he smiled, and it figured, in ten years he'd be forty five, "no, not really. I enjoy working where I do. Though, away from the career aspect, Id like to have a child."

"You said you hated kids," I laughed.

"I do," he replied, "however, Id hate to leave this world and leave nothing behind, no legacy."

I was in agreeance. He was right, as he was about most things. I wouldn't want to have no one to visit me when I got old or take care of my affairs after I was gone, hell, I'd want someone to at least remember me after I kicked the bucket.

"You think a lot about the future," I pointed out and he nodded, saying nothing. His eyes drifted shut and he finally relaxed. I watched him sink deeper into the bed, his chest took deeper breathes at a slower rate and I felt him tighten the grip on my hand to hold it. I decided he shouldn't have done that seconds after, because his eyes opened slowly and he sat up, looking over at me deep in thought before he got out of bed.

"I've got to go now, lock the door on your way out," he muttered, and seconds later he was gone without even so much as a good bye. I sat up too and watched him leave, unable to understand what had just happened. He'd been the one initiating it hadn't he? And I thought I didn't like to touch people! How can someone ask you to meet there family but not able to hold your hand? I groaned and put my head in my hands a moment before I left the room too, locking the door as requested. I didn't go looking for him this time, I just tried to forget about it or burry it in the bottom of a drink.

I was careful not to spill my white wine on my bed cover as I lay down, propped up on my pillows with a magazine in my other hand, I felt like my aunt who always came to christmas drunk. This wine was not doing it for me at all, so I decided to just chug a bunch of it, but that just got me buzzed and frustrated. I went looking for Deidara, finding him eating an antipasto salad that'd come with pizza a few nights ago in the living room, he offered me some, but I refused.

"Would you drive me to Walgreens please? I'm probably not good to drive," I said, swaying as the liquor started to take effect.

"I can't Kimi, sorry," he replied sort of sheepishly, mumbling something I couldn't hear.

"What was that?" I asked and he sighed.

"Sasori asked me not to help you buy anymore alcohol," he said, not able to make eye contact with me. I sighed, frustrated further, but I didn't blame him. I tried again with Kisame but he was busy and also unable to drive me. I wasn't about to ask Tobi, so I decided to just go back to my bedroom.

I was to my door when Deidara came quickly up the stairs with a set of keys in his hand. He made a motion for me to shush and we quickly left the house via the back door. He grabbed his paint stash from under the back deck and we took off. I found that Deidara was no better at driving than he was when I first meet him. I thought my head would roll off around every corner and I thought I might jerk right out of the passenger seat at every red light.

"You didn't take this car, did you?" I thought to ask at a particularly long light.

"No, Sasori gave me the keys, but he was in the dinning room, so I had to tell you no at first so I could get the keys," he grinned. He sure was smart for nineteen.

"I'm gonna try and spray a wall down town, is that okay with you?" He asked, pressing on the gas as the light turned green.

"Sure," I smiled, looking over at him. He would be the last thing I saw before a car smashed into my side. The impact didn't hurt, in fact I was fine even though broken glass covered my lap. Something large and white came at me from the corner of my eye, growing larger as it got closer until everything went black.

X

When I woke up, I was sitting in the back seat of the car. Flashers from cop cars illuminated the intersection as I sat up and tried to figure out what had happened. Deidara was sitting on the hood of Sasori's smashed car, his head in his hands, and upon noticing I was up, jumped down to hustle my direction.

"Jesus Christ, your awake!" He cried, throwing his arms around me, "I was beginning to think you were dead!"

"What happened?" I asked, patting his back. Why did the right side of my face hurt so badly?

"Some idiot ran a red light and hit us. The airbag on your side deployed and knocked you out. Do you want to go to the hospital?" He asked, but I shook my head. He helped me up and informed me that my boyfriend was on his way. I was in deep shit.

In the time before Sasori got there the other driver was ticketed, our statements were taken, and I was asked about a hundred times if I wanted to go to the hospital.

When my boyfriend did get there, he arrived in Kakuzu's car, his mood matching the color of his hair, fiery and angry,, his hands set to fists as he get out, but when his eyes fell on us, they softened.

"Oh my god Kimi," he gasped, and I was about to ask what when Deidara interrupted.

"Sasori, I'm so sorry, It wasn't my fault and I-" the blonde sputtered, but Sasori quieted him.

"I know it wasn't your fault. The car can be replaced, but please tell me, what were you doing in my car Kimi?" The red head asked, eyes narrowed and set on me.

"I was going to get alcohol," I muttered. He did not look happy.

"After I specifically asked you not to Deidara," he hissed, turning to look at the blonde.

"Hey, don't blame him," I spat, "I insisted. He just went along with it."

"Excuse me," a policeman interjected, "but we are trying to get the intersection clear."

Deidara and I went back to Kakuzu's car and climbed into the back, the banker quiet behind the wheel. After finishing up and having his busted car towed, Sasori climbed in too, and Kakuzu turned around to take us home.

I watched out the front windshield feeling sort of dizzy. I reached up to rub my aching cheek and hissed in pain. The entire car heard me, and I watched Kakuzu in the mirror grin sort of stupidly and adjusted his rear view mirror, giving me the first look at my injury.

The entire right side of my face was covered by a dark blue bruise. The air bag had caused it no doubt. I gently ran my hand over it, up my temple, under my eyes, and down my chin in disbelief.

"We'll get you some ice for it," Deidara tried to console me, but I wasn't having it. We arrived home without further event and Sasori guided me into the kitchen. Deidara had tried to fallow but the red head waved him away. He put me up on the counter and went to the freezer, got some ice, put it in a bag and handed it to me. I gingerly applied it to the bruise, whining in pain the whole time. He pulled up a chair from the small table pushed up against the wall and sat down, watching me.

"Thank you," I murmured.

"Your welcome," he replied. He had a hundred things he wanted to tell me. He wanted to tell me how angry he was that alcohol had nearly cost me my life, that he'd almost lost me, that I was a slave to my addiction, but he said none of it. The booze and the accident were not directly related, I could have been in that car for any reason, it wasn't like I was drunk.

"You don't have to go to dinner if you don't want to," he said flatly, "not with that..."

"I still wanna go," I replied, "if you still want me to."

"Of course I do," he huffed.

"What was that about earlier? When you tried to hold my hand?" I asked, quietly. At first I thought he hadn't heard me. A silence proceeded my question, so I thought maybe he'd only heard me mumble.

"Is that why you were drinking?" He asked, seemingly surprised.

"I drink for a lot of reasons, don't change the subject," I replied, taking the ice away from my numbing face. He sighed and reclined in the chair, his eyes evaluating everything in the room except for me. Then he got up, checked the living room and dinning room for people, and when he found none, he sat back down and sighed again, deeper this time.

"I have a problem connecting with people. I lost both of my parents when I was seven, since then," he shook his head, directing his attention down to his hands where he found something very interesting with his finger nails, "I'm trying."

"I'm glad your trying," I smiled, "you go at your own pace okay?"

He nodded as I picked my ice pack back up, drained sone of the melted water out and applied it to my bruise again. My boyfriend noted that it looked a little lighter, though I think he was just trying to make me feel better.

Sasori was more damaged than he appeared on the outside. He really cared about me deep down, but he was also quick to attach himself to others, but then pushed them away. He was constantly afraid of loosing everyone just like he did his parents, one minute they'd be there and then gone the next.

The red head got up, grabbed a dish towel and helped me down off of the counter. He insisted it was bed time, but I didn't want it to be. I settled for a little time laying next to each other in my bed, peacefully enjoying a quiet moment together before he left. I put the dish towel between me and the ice pack so I could lay on it and half lidded, wondering what else I could do to help him without pushing him. I supposed nothing, like me and my own problem, he would have to over come it himself.


	10. Chapter 10

The washer at the red dawn boarding house was a lovely starch white machine that had four settings. One for delicates, one for towels, one for regular wash and another for heavy. Each setting had possibilities for water level, amount of cycles and that was all well and fine. It got cloths impeccably clean and for that I loved it more than I loved a fresh package of sanitizing wet wipes.

However, the next morning when I attempted to start my own laundry, I found the wonderful washer broken. Kakuzu had yet to leave for work, so I went looking for him to see about getting it fixed.

"I'll have a look at it later," he grunted, pulling on a leather loafer.

"Can't we call a repair man? I need these cloths to be ready for tonight, I'm going to dinner," I said, stating my case.

"I'm not hiring some asshole until I know what's wrong. Money does not grow on trees," he spat, "your cloths are not my problem."

He left me fuming in the hallway as he got in his car and went to work. I made a mental note to find a way to get him back later but Id already forgot by the time I arrived at a solution to my problem. Id have to go over and bug Tobi to use his washer. As it happened, he was leaving and his aunt and uncle had run off to work, and he told me that he'd love to let me, but it went against some of the new rules Konan had lay down, in fact, I was violating one right that moment, he was supposed to have either Pein or Konan home when friends came over. I didn't want to push his luck so I left, managing to work myself up in the short walk back home.

I ran upstairs fearing a panic attack and opened my pill bottle, about to throw back another pill when I realized I only had five left. If I took one now, or I needed another or whichever problem my rushing brain came up with despite it being possible, I wouldn't have one for later if I really needed it.

I tried to talk myself down out of it but I couldn't, no matter how many deep breathes or sheep I counted, I was still freaking the fuck out. I decided agenst my better judgement to try and drink it off, hoping the alcohol, being a depressant, would relax me. It didn't.

I was half drunk when I got the bright idea to call Sasori at work to ask him for that physiologist's number. But wait a second, he told me not to do that, but I had to, but he'd be mad, but I needed something, anything. Finally I broke down and called my boyfriend at work, half sobbing into my glass of wine. I was lucky he picked up and not the kids or Deidara.

"Hello?" He drawled.

"Sasori?" I asked, and before he had a chance to answer I started in at a million miles an hour.

"Kimi, stop," he commanded, "stop. Tell me what's wrong?"

"Okay," I took a deep breath, "okay, the washer is broken, and Tobi left and I'm almost out of medicine, plus I have this huge bruise on my face and I can't go to dinner without cloths, I already look like a mess, and-"

"Kimi, stop," he commanded again, "stop. You have other cloths. We can get you more medicine."

"But I-" I tried to interject but he refused to allow it. He sort of forced me to stay calm, and I liked that.

"Stop," he said calmly, sounding quite cool over the phone, "I'm sending Deidara to get you. Until then, lay off the alcohol, sit down, and I want you to count the number of cars that go down the street."

We said good bye and I turned to the window after seating myself on the couch. I counted the cars just like he asked me to until Deidara showed up in the loaner car Sasori had while his was getting fixed. Id counted only forty three but the number, I supposed, was satisfactory since the end result was to keep me calm. It served it purpose. Deidara stayed quiet and let me play with the radio on the way back to the store. He never minded the million times I changed the station, though he was sure to change it back to talk radio when we arrived.

He took me in though the back to avoid any people in my personal space and set me up in the wood working room.

"Sasori said he'll be around as soon as he can get away from the front desk," my surrogate brother grinned, patting my arm, "if you wanna organize those awls feel free."

He had to leave too, saying something about restocking, and I turned around to the task at hand. The house had been relatively stagnant the past few days besides all the drama, staying strangely clean, so I was almost glad to find something to do with myself besides watch tv.

I first collected all of the awls from around the room, wiped them off and then began organizing the wood working tools by length. A rack had already been made for them so all I had to do was put them away, though, judging by the pristine condition of the rack it didn't see much use.

Id just finished when the hinges on the door creaked open and then shut, attracting my attention. Sasori, looking sort of tired and worn out came my way, pulling up a chair and sitting down to gaze in my direction.

"I'm sorry, I know you told me not to call you at work but I-" I tried to explain but he rose a hand to silence me.

"How many cars did you see?" He asked, a small smile ghosting onto his face. I smiled back at him, telling him only forty three, but Id expected more.

"That's fine. We've got eternity to count cars," he replied sort of dryly, "you were freaking out about the washer? What's wrong with the cloths you have on?"

I shook my head, my grin falling, nothing was exactly wrong with them I supposed. It was the principle of the thing though, it was an important party from my point of view, I should wear a better outfit than jeans and a v-neck. In reality the party was just a simple get together. Sasori didn't even plan on changing out of his work cloths.

"I'll call about your medicine later on, now, do you think you can stay back here and calm down?" he drawled, and I knew he was thinking yet again I was too immature for him. I nodded, feeling sort of defeated and tired now the panic was working its way out of my system.

"Listen," he sighed, coming closer to hold gently my cheek in his spindly fingers, "don't feel bad. You can't help it."

He was right, I couldn't help it and Id probably never be able to. I knew he didn't feel like he was baby sitting me but I felt like a child compared to him. After thumbing my lower lip, he leaned down and gave me a quick peck on the lips. He left then, hand lingering on my face. Slowly but surely he was getting better.

I decided to sit down in the chair my boyfriend had previously occupied and I put my legs up on a nearby stool, kicking back with no one around and time to let myself catch up. I hadn't noticed Id fallen asleep until Deidara was shaking me awake.

"Sasori's closing up right now, time to go," he grinned, tip toeing around me after such a rough day. I nodded and collected myself, heading out into the hot summer sun to climb in to the car's passenger seat as my little brother got in the back. He'd started the car and air condoning, so it was comfortable inside as we watched the heat waves rise above the engine. The red head joined us moments later.

"We're just going to drop Deidara off, we'll be late if we stay any longer," he informed me, and I knew how he felt about being late. I couldn't help but think he was already in a rush as we pulled in to the house and pulled back out, minus one Deidara, all in under thirty seconds.

I was sure he was rushing by the time we arrived at his sister's house, parking on the street and past the drive way. He lead the way up to the house, a simple ranch styled home with a lovely rose garden standing front and center in a curving flower bed that framed the house and the walkway. The interior of the house was just as cozy. I could see a large oak table from the door, set with white plates and flowers in the center. Sasori's nephews and niece milled around their mother, who stood at the stove, putting the finishing touches on her meat, potatoes and extra vegetables.

"Come on in Sasori!" The blonde woman chipped, turning around for just a second to great us, "Oh! Hi, you must be Kimi! Welcome! I'm Karura!"

"It's nice to meet you," I grinned, sort of nervously. I was tired but still on edge from earlier, but I knew I needed to force myself to get though tonight.

"Okay guys!" Karura shouted, "come eat!"

Another man drifted in from the living room, then an elderly man after him, and finally an elderly woman brought up the rear, a blonde man helping her to her seat. No one else was present.

Rasa was Sasori's brother in law and shook my hand when he greated me. He was brown haired and had hard looking eyes, but he treated his wife kindly and complimented her cooking without even tasting it. He was stern with the kids, commanding them to be quiet and wash their hands immediately, but still asked them how their days had gone while he was at work.

Yashamaru was Karura and Sasori's half brother, and he took shook my hand before pulling me in to a hug. He was warm personalities and happy, and he made small talk with me as we made up our plates. I sat between him and Sasori, and across from the woman this dinner was for.

Sasori's grandmother was a surly old grouch way past her time. She scrutinized her husband for every little thing and constantly yelled at her granddaughter and great grand children. Karura managed to laugh it off but the kids weren't so keen.

"Grandmother," Sasori spoke up, clearing his throat and pulling her attention from Gaara, "Id like you to meet my girlfriend."

"About time," she sneered, "what's your name girl?"

"K-Kimiko," I stuttered, intimidated. She narrowed her eyes at me and grunted a laugh before she went back to eating and that was the end of it. I looked over to Sasori who visibly relaxed and I assumed that was the end of it. Id been accepted. I grinned and reached to hold my boyfriends hand under the table, giving his palm a gentile squeeze.

The rest of dinner went well, I managed to avoid any attention drawn to me and the food was good. No alcohol was served and we left the house after dinner, Sasori hadn't wanted to stay longer, silently insisting that his family was on his last nerve. After arriving back at the house, we were about to part ways in the hallway to head to our respective rooms when he halted me.

"I suppose I owe you a good night kiss?" He drawled, eyes looking heavy and his tone lax. I grinned and leaned in to kiss him, meshing our lips together in a warm lip lock that sent tingles up my spine. I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull him closer and I did likewise with his hips, our lips stuck together like glue. As soon as one of us tried to pull away, the other drew them back in, until we both had to come up for air.

"Could you do one thing for me?" He questioned and I nodded, half dreaming and half lidded.

"Id like to paint you, not you per say, but you, as the canvas."

"What does that involve exactly?" I questioned, holding him tightly against me still. He wanted to be intimate but without being sexual. The next thing I knew I was sitting cross legged on his bed while he dimmed the lights, and paired with the heat of this summer night, the room felt peaceful and inviting. I was drunk without drinking.

"Your going to have to take off your top. I won't look," he assured, retreating for a moment to grab a box containing paint from his closet and a towel from a pile of freshly folded ones. I stalled a little, unsure of what I'd just agreed to. He watched me for a second before he made a hand motion to hurry up. This would be harmless I reasoned, he couldn't see if I faced away from him. After spreading the towel out, I adjusted my seat, facing away from him at an angle I was sure I was safe from any wandering eyes and did as requested of me.

He sat down behind me and swept my hair to the side, tucking it behind my shoulder to keep a clear space. I heard the paint tube open and squirt out. He used his own arm as a paint pallet and a horse hair paintbrush, thin and fine.

The paint was wet and cold, but where the artist rested his hand it was warm.

"I appreciate this," he droned, like he was coached to say it. I didn't respond.

Paintings, usually, lasted a long time, some hundreds, some others thousands of years. Sasori loved something more the longer it was intended to last. I wasn't aware he'd been a painter until now, and the longer he worked the more relaxed he got. His short, nervous brush strokes got longer and longer, more thought put in to each movement. I wondered if it felt as good to him as it did me. I felt very calm, especially after all the day's events, and I owed it all to him.

"It'll be dry in a few minutes. This is a special kind of paint, it's going to stain your skin but it won't get on your cloths or anything," he sighed. Looking over my shoulder I watched him and he watched back.

"Would you like to see?" He asked, sticking the brush in a nearby, forgotten glass of water. I nodded. He found a small mirror in a drawer and angled it where I could see by turning my head. He'd painted a copy of starry night, beautiful blues and blacks dotted with a bright contrasting yellow.

"It's so pretty," I gasped, feeling very fortunate I was dating someone with so much talent.

"It's a reproduction," he said in monotone, laying the mirror down, "paint isn't my strong point as you could imagine."

"Oh, no, don't say that," I grinned, "I think it's lovely."

He grinned too, that sort of sad looking smile that Id grown so accustomed to, "I'm glad you like it," he sighed, as if he hadn't just made a work of art on my skin. He was a classic kind of guy and I loved that. He liked Hemingway, fine art, he was an entrepreneur, what was next? A white horse to sweep me further off my feet?

I thought back how awkward this relationship had started, mostly drunk with a lot of confusion and it had all lead up to the dinner and it had gone unimaginably well.

"Can I ask what happened to your mom and dad?" I asked suddenly, and seconds later I realized Id ruined our moment. He chewed his cheek for a moment, weighing his options and considering what he should say. I shyed away from him, thinking Id upset him, but surprisingly he opened his mouth and told me everything.

"My father passed away when Karura and I were young, and my mother got remarried. Everything was fine for some time until they passed away in a car accident. I was five or so."

He must have been so worried when Id gotten smashed, thinking Id meet the same fate as his parents. I watched his face change from a relaxed, vaguely happy expression to one that looked set on edge, and I watched him take a deep breathe and calm himself, telling himself he could do this.

"My grandparents saw us kids as more a burden.. Yashamaru went to live with another aunt since he was so young and Karura sought happyness in boyfriends, so she wasn't around much either. "

I didn't respond long after he'd finished speaking because I wasn't sure exactly what to say. I touched his hand reassuringly though, and he continued.

"I'm glad things turned out so well," he said, sounding genuine, "My younger brother is happy, my sister has three beautiful children and a husband, just like she wanted, and my grandparents are still hanging in there."

"What about you though?" I asked quietly and his reply did not surprise me. He tilted my chin down and kissed my forehead, just like a princess with his lips lingering on my skin, "well I've got you and Deidara. That's all I need."

Everything was out in the open now, no more skeletons. He pulled me closer now the paint was dry and held me without an urge to push me away or leave the room, a few tears escaping his eyes until he got ahold of himself.

"You mean a lot to me too," I murmured, nuzzling my nose in to his neck, "I love you."

"I love you too," he returned.

It didn't feel strange to tell him that. It was amazing to me that I was able to let him in to my closed off, nerve wracking world and I was so happy for that, not to mention the joy he brought me.

"Kimi," he mumbled, having to repeat himself because I hadn't heard him the first time, "would you marry me?"


	11. Chapter 11

It took a few moments for me to register what he'd just asked me.

Would I marry him?

Yes. Yes I would. But could I tell him that?

The answer was no. No I could not and before I knew it I was hyperventilating. I held my head in my hands and tried to count sheep, but all I could think about was getting a drink. My brain rushed, get a drink, say yes, get a drink, get ahold of yourself, get a drink, calm down, get a drink. Why was I panicking? Nothing bad was happening, in fact, under all the anxiety I was actually over joyed.

"You can say no," he murmured, removing his hands from my person and moving away to give me some space. It was like something broke inside me, because all of a sudden I wanted him to touch me and be near me. I didn't are about germs anymore, I just wanted genuine skin to skin contact, and I wanted it from him.

I turned and aggressively pulled him in to a rushed, clawing hug and held him there, his arms gently wrapping around me as my chest heaved. One sheep, I gasped, two sheep, okay, okay, this was working.

"Sasori, I'm not too immature?" I managed, struggling though leaving breathe to beg him to reassure me.

"No," he asserted. I thought maybe I was making him uncomfortable. I wasn't, but I thought I was.

"You love me?" I more suggested and he agreed that he did love me.

Okay, three sheep, four sheep, breathe in ten seconds and exhale, five sheep. It took a few more minutes to get ahold of myself but when I did, looking up at him with those beautiful brown eyes silently asking if I was alright, I heaved a heavy sigh of relief and touched the fabric of his shirt with quaking fingers.

"Yes," I breathed, nodding my head, "yes, I'll marry you."

I heaved another sigh and slumped against him, the after shock of exhaustion took me right away. His grip on me tightened, provoking a smile to my lips as I buried my head in to his shoulder.

He fell back on the bed, bringing me with him, still clutching each other like we might never be able to again. He was relived, I could tell. I was sure he thought I was going to say no, not that it mattered though, we would have continued seeing each other no matter what. My eyes drifted shut, but I opened them again to look up at my new fiancé, only to discover he'd done the same. I decided to snuggle a little closer to him and relax and shut my eyes again, if not fall asleep. I knew he was tired from work, not to mention his family. I thought he might have muttered something like 'thank god' but I couldn't be sure because the door to the room on our left, Deidara's room, slammed open and slammed shut again. We were about to ignore it and go back to sleep when something outside, something big, clattered on the roof. It wouldn't have bothered me except we were on the second floor and trouble had a tendency to fallow Deidara.

"It's not your problem," Sasori groaned, tightening his grip on me.

"I'm the building manager," I reminded and begrudgingly pulled myself from his grasp. I didn't want to leave and gave him an apologetic look as I left. It was still quite warm out and the sun wasn't even all the way down, so I supposed it was around nine, nine thirty. Kisame was on the couch alone and motioned to the kitchen as soon as I reached the bottom step, he jutted him thumb out to the kitchen. Pots and pans banged seconds later, so I continued on my way.

Deidara was standing over what I could best describe as a vat, a wide, tall, pot that he'd brought to a simmer on the stove. No sooner had I seen it I could smell it, and it smelled absolutely rancid, like fish, sauerkraut and brown sugar.

"What are you doing?" I managed without choking, surprising even myself I hadn't thrown up.

"I'm making something to keep Tobi away from me," he hissed, pouring half a bag of flour in to his mix. The pot was already bubbling and I was sure that the flour was only going to irritate the concoction further.

"Tobi?" I echoed, taking a step back, sure that his sick silence experiment was going to explode any second.

"Tobi," he agreed, "fucking idiot won't leave me alone."

"What's he doing? Is that him on the roof?" I asked, spotting a lid nearby and slamming it on to the pot before any other ingredients layer out on the counter could make their way inside. Just the smell of this stuff made me nervous.

"Trying to make up. I told him I was all done and to enjoy his heterosexual lifestyle, but he's insistent," Deidara stuck out his tongue and slipped the lid up in attempt to add a can of cream of chicken soup in to the mix but the steam that escaped had us both gagging.

"I think it's done," he choked, turning the heat off and grabbing a pair of oven gloves to remove it from the stove. He attempted to carry it upstairs, wanting to throw it down gout my window!) on to Tobi, but I rerouted him to the front yard. If he was going to create a nightmare he was going to do it outside and nowhere near my stuff.

"Whatever, this way I can just throw it straight in his face," he grunted, a little pissed I wouldnt go along with his plan, "fucking idiot deserves this, HEY, TOBI," he shouted.

From my vantage point in the front yard, away from Deidara, I could see a spot on our roof that didn't look like shingles. Tobi shimmied out far enough that he caught some light from the street lamp, and hung his legs over the edge.

"Are you ready to talk?" he asked, leaning a bit too far for my nerves.

"I'm ready to talk alright," Deidara grumbled.

Tobi disappeared for a second, getting up and walking around the back of the house. I didn't hear anything while, and I worried he'd fallen off and gotten hurt until he came around the house, climbing over the backyard fence.

"Deidara, before you say anything," Tobi grinned though the darkness, "I want you to know that I love you, okay? I know I never said it before but I love you."

Deidara looked positively disturbed to hear that.

"That mess with Rin was a mess, that's all. My head is clear," Tobi elaborated, coming to join us in the light of the porch. I didn't say anything but stuck around to keep the peace.

"Your head should have been clear before you kissed her," Deidara hissed, backing away as Tobi came closer.

"Your completely right," Tobi agreed. I could see him eyeing the pot his blonde exlover was holding. As if he was some kind of idiot, Tobi came closer still and Deidara heaved his science experiment on to him, pot, lid and all, coating the black haired man from his nose down to his hips. The pot flew by him and on to the grass but Tobi ignored the hazardous object still.

I could see the literal terror in Deidara's eyes as his exlover ignored the smell and texture of the mix completely. It was burning my eyes and churning my stomach, and I was still seven feet away from it. Tobi came closer still and the blonde artist tried to get away, but was instead captured in a tight hug. No matter how much he struggled, Tobi refused to let go.

"Oh my god!" Dei shrieked, "how can you stand that?!"

"Same way I stand you!" Tobi grinned, laughing. Deidara swore and called him names, struggling and trying to force himself out of Tobi's grip until tears brimmed on his eyes and he started crying. He turned and hugged Tobi, burying his face in his shoulder. Tobi turned to mush seconds later. Deidara didn't care the least bit that Tobi had a thick, chunky, sticky, stinking, orange mess all over him and he was smearing it between them in the embrace, at least he didn't care for that moment.

I couldn't help but smile as I walked out in to the yard and turned on the garden hose, breaking up their moment with a blast of cold water.

"Kimi! What the fuck?" My surrogate little brother shouted, trying in vain to escape the water, but I had a gardening nozzle and it had a jet setting.

"You aren't coming back in my house smelling like that," I grinned as he made a run for the front door. I could see Sasori on the other side of the screen, holding the handle and keeping it shut. Tobi helped me out, lifting him up and holding him still again, tickling him and laughing too. I sprayed them both down and Sasori made them remove their clothing before he traded them towels and a laundry basket for entry in to the house. Their cloths would be washed and dried in under an hour, plus, Deidara had sweatpants enough for both of them.

"Now," the tired eyed red head muttered, "after all this is taken care of, where were we?"

"Your going to bed," I grinned, "I'm awake now, but you deserve some good rest."

"You'll join me when you return to bed?" He asked, innocently enough. I agreed and we parted, him for bed and me for the television, and then probably a little wine after.

* * *

Apparently more than a little wine. I woke up on my bedroom floor, white wine all down the front of me and no recollection of how I'd gotten here. I could hear yelling down stairs, and that probably wasn't good. I had to remind myself this time that I was the building manager and I needed to find out what it was, so after changing my shirt I drug myself downstairs.

Deidara and Sasuke were having a screaming match in the middle of the living room over the upstairs shower while Hidan, who I hadn't seen in weeks, lay on the couch, his arm over his face, bitching up a storm. I was reminded it was Saturday when I spotted Sasori in the kitchen, face propped up on his hand over a cup of coffee.

"No fighting!" I shouted, passing though, but I was largely ignored.

After making myself a cup of tea I sat down next to Sasori, who looked less not impressed than usual.

"Good morning," I greeted, and he grunted in response.

"When did Hidan get here?" I asked, taking a sip of my tea.

"He came in last night very late. He woke the entire house up, where were you?" He returned in a snarky tone. I deserved it after I'd used that building manager thing on him last but then I hadn't heard Hidan's voice at all.

"I never heard anything," I replied, clearing my throat and looking away from him. I knew I was gonna catch hell.

"Mmm, well maybe if you weren't so drunk it caused you pass out you would have," Sasori snapped, "I'm not going to tolerate this any longer. You've got a problem and you need help."

"I can stop any time I want," I insisted, "besides, it's not like I did anything embarrassing or, like, bad."

"I see, so allowing your tenant to cause problems for your other tenants is okay?" He asked rhetorically. I huffed. Well if he wanted to be like that, fine. Standing up and going in to the living room, I forcibly pushed the fighting teenagers apart, telling Sasuke he had ten minutes to shower before I turned the water off on him and send Deidara to clean up his mess in the front yard. I told him it was better that way anyway, he could get clean right after he finished.

Hidan was a little different. I eventually nagged him in to his bedroom with empty threats of eviction and some bullshit I made up about the mess in his room being against house rules. Regardless, he left.

Flopping back down at the kitchen table next to Sasori, I found my tea cold. "Happy now?"

"No, not really," he said levely, blinking sleep from tired eyes. I rolled my eyes.

We shared a comfortable silence in the coming moments, letting ourselves wake up all the way and sharing an hour together fresh morning air coming though the kitchen window. We were quiet people, quiet worked well for us, It allowed us both comfortable, quality time with each other. We could spend eternity without mouths and still be happy.

I reheated my tea and after a while of enjoying the calm composure of the morning and when I sat down again, he had a question prompted for me.

"Kimi, do you enjoy living here?"

"Yes," I answered after giving it some thought.

"Alright," he replied flatly, turning to Kakuzu as he entered the room, handed Sasori the news paper and then left again.

Why bother with a question like that I wondered,"Why?"

"I was just thinking..." He trailed off, looking off in to space with his usual bored expression before blinking and opening the paper. He spoke as he read. "With the money I have, We could buy a house and move, or open another store and stay here. Your college will have no cost though the government aid system as it stands currently, so your free to do that as long as we don't get married, but," he paused, thinking hard for just a second before he continued in a more serious tone, "I'm prepared to put you in a managerial position without schooling at the existing location so we could be free to get married whenever. These are the options now, they'll change later. It's whatever you think at this point."

"Me?" I questioned, my jaw slack and unable to comprehend what I was hearing.

"Yes, you. This is your future too," he sighed, flipping the news paper page and brushing off the seriousness of the conversation.

"But Sasori," I stuttered, "it's your money."

"Yes," he repeated, very matter of factly, " and after we get married it'll be our money. You agreed to share your life with me, and generally when people get married, they share possessions too."

"Regardless, you worked hard, way hard, I don't think it's right for me to be able to claim any ownership of it," I tried to explain my position but his mind was made up.

"Nonsense," he asserted, "you'll be legally entitled."

That didn't sit well with me and he realized that, asking if he'd made me nervous, but I told him no even though it did and escaped upstairs to take my medicine.

I wasn't sure what I'd expected, Sasori was older, he'd already thought out all this stuff and accepted it. Hell, he probably already named our nonexistent, future children. He was at a different point in his life than I was, he was established and sure if himself and my sorry ass had just moved out of my parents house earlier that year. I took my pill with a drink, deciding if I kept this stuff in a cup I couldn't see though I could carry it with me, and used one I'd procured a few days ago. Wine was different than vodka, I could drink more and be less drunk and that was a good thing, It was nice not feeling funny after taking my pills with alcohol, the biggest no no on the warning label.

I was going to get married, I was going to grow up a little more, manage something, take care of this house, probably have a baby, and with my liquid courage it wasn't so bad accepting that. After my liquid courage wore off though, I was a mess. If tried to take a shower, and what started off as a peaceful moment for myself ended up sobbing on the floor. This was genuine fear, panic and regret all rolled in to one. It wasn't until someone beat on the door I realized the water had run cold.

"Kimi?" Deidara shouted, "sorry to bug you but I gotta pee and Kakuzu is working on the plumbing downstairs. Something to do with the washer..."

I nearly jumped out of my skin as I got out of the tub and grabbed a towel. After wrapping myself up tight I flung open the door and came face to face with the blonde.

"Are you okay?" He asked immediately. He'd seen my red, puffy eyes and I'd neglected to turn the water off, so it was a dead giveaway something was wrong. I nodded furiously.

"Calm down okay? Deep breathes," he encouraged, "I'll be upstairs in a second and we can talk."

I nodded again and jerked around him as I made a mad dash upstairs, thanking God that no one else was around because I hadn't grabbed my cloths or gotten dressed. I'd talked myself down before I panicked and with shaking hands found myself a drink and then a second and then a third before Deidara came.

"Maybe you should talk to Sasori," he suggested right off the bat, first thing out if his mouth, before he'd even closed the door. He meant well, and I knew he was worried about me, especially after seeing the drink in my hand, but now was not the time.

"No, no," I stuttered, "not yet, I don't want him to know I'm afraid."

"Afraid of what?" He asked, going to sit on the edge of my bed and patting a spot next to him. I danced in place for a moment before deciding I needed to sit down and seated myself in the middle, pulling my legs of to my chest but careful of the wine.

"Uh, uh oh God, it's a secret, um," I muttered before deciding to tell him anyway. I was going to panic either way. "Listen, you can't tell anyone, you can't even tell Sasori that you know, okay?"

He nodded but I continued asking him if he understood until he lost his patience.

"We're gonna get married, like, married married, and have a kid and a house and everything, I mean, not until later, " I explained talking a mile a minute, "he wants to open another toy store, let me manage the old store, but, married Deidara, like, together, by law. Like, share everything, I mean, where does he get off telling me that I'll be entitled to everything he's got?"

"I dunno Kimi, I think it'd be nice. He just wants to take care of you," the blonde grinned after giving it some thought, "congrats by the way. I guess the old man really does hate to wait hm?" He laughed, "he hasn't even known you six months."

It made sense, I decided while nursing my drink further. No one took care of Sasori when he was young, so Sasori wanted to take care of me, and Deidara, and his sister's kids too. I surmised he be an excellent father, when and if that time came in the future, but the blondes final remark reminded me that I was still worried about the speed of this progression.

"He's more or less right," he hairs on the back of my neck stood on end.

"Oh, Sasori," Deidara grinned sheepishly, "how long have you been standing there?"

"I heard the whole thing, I wouldn't have if you'd properly shut the door Deidara," he muttered, scowling, "and Kimi, should you really be drinking?"

I ignored that remark. Deidara took a hike and left the red head and I alone, much to my distain. This time I heard the door click shut behind him. Sasori came closer and took his spot on the bed.

"Slow down," he spoke gently, "I know we're moving fast but not that fast, alright? We don't even have a wedding date. It can be as soon or as far away as we like."

"Yeah but," I sighed, "this is so much..."

"I feel the same way," he sighed too, "but I'm sure I want to be with you and that's enough, don't you think?"

I nodded. I moved over to give him room to lay down and he took it, kicking back on what was quick becoming his side of the bed. He was pushing me and he knew it, and he was pushing himself too. Sasori was the kind of person to keep note books of plans and ideas, he loved to be able to execute things quickly, and he loved to finish something so he could move on to the next. I felt a little like one of his projects, but wasn't I? And wasn't he one of mine? That was just his personality I decided, drinking down the rest of my wine.

I was feeling it, and I was reflecting it. My speech slurred and my face was read, I swayed a little where I sat and watched him though blurring eyes. I'd gotten this drunk on purpose but, why? I felt nauseous, light headed and this wasn't any fun anymore.

"I'm thinking next year," he told, tone even, calm and collected, "for the wedding."

I nodded. A year would be enough time.

"Can we wait to tell people?" I asked, setting my now empty cup down. He nodded. Finally I heaved a heavy sigh of relief and flopped down on the bed. Crisis averted.

"But in the mean time, we've got to do something about that nasty drinking problem of yours."


End file.
